Christmas gift thoughts

It's the day after Christmas and I love everything I received. Among the many gifts I received, two stand out for very different reasons. The first notable gift is Optimash Prime. Now Darth Tater has a companion on the shelf. The second gift worthy of comment, and by far my favorite (but not for the reasons you expect), is my Obi-Wan Kenobi light sabre. The gift of the light sabre actually has a few spiritual applications. In order to understand those, you'll have to read the whole story.

Earlier in the fall as my family began making Christmas lists, the one thing I put on my list was the aforementioned weapon of choice by one of the greatest known Jedi knights. They only cost about seven or eight dollars, so I figured this would be a shoe-in. My wife knows I like to get toys and she also knows how Star Wars seems to dominate our family's life at times.

My hopes of getting this light sabre disappeared when a local sporting goods store began clearancing out its camping gear. We had the opportunity to buy a nice family sized tent for only 40% of the original cost. We gave our boys a choice. We could a) spend our entire alloted Christmas budget for Mommy & Daddy gifts on the tent or b) give the boys the money to buy individual gifts for us so they could have the opportunity to go shopping. They chose A, so my wife and I received our Christmas gift in early November. We bought a tent that is literally the size of our bedroom.

Now, it must be added that we reminded the boys they had their own money they could choose to spend on Mommy and Daddy if they wanted. Of course, we did not expect them to. In the meantime, I had been planning to buy a light sabre with my own money after Christmas so that the boys and I could have some Jedi fun whenever we needed to burn off some energy.

On Christmas morning I was surprised to receive the very thing I wanted most - my very own Obi-Wan Kenobi light sabre. It was a gift from my boys and it warmed my heart so. Not only was I surprised at the gift itself, but I was surprised they had managed to keep it a secret, especially my youngest.

While pondering this wonderful gift, two important lessons came to mind. First, the boys bought this with their own money. It was something they really wanted to do because they knew how much I wanted it. They actually demonstrated some level of selflessness and thinking beyond themselves for a change. For those of you who have wondered if your children will ever get there, take this as hope that they will. My boys aren't completely selfless, but this was a step.

In order to appreciate the second lesson, you must hear the rest of the story. My boys sent their mother out shopping for the light sabre. All she knew was it had to be a blue light sabre. Much to her dismay upon bringing it home, she was told very quickly that she had bought the wrong one. She had bought the Anakin Skywalker light sabre. As you can see from the picture above, they are vey different (Obi-Wan is on top, Anakin on the bottom). She was not aware that such a distinction existed. She was able to return the wrong one and exchange it for the proper replica.

Here's the lesson, and despite all premises, it's a deep and important one. Lots of people "buy" what they think is real Christianity. They find something that resembles what little they know about it. Sometimes that's not a risky choice; sometimes it is. Some people don't even know that light sabres come in different colors, let alone may have different handles. Some people don't know that Christianity is not just like all the other religions. All religions do not lead to the same place.

So what do you do if you are one of these people that knows very little about faith in general but you are searching for authentic Christianity? At some point you have to become familiar with the product. As I always say here, never do it alone. Go to the Bible to find out the details on the story. Begin your search with another group of people. Make sure there are people like yourself AND people who already have the answers in that group. Keep yourself open to the direction of the Holy Spirit. If you get off track and bring home the wrong model, the Holy Spirit will redirect you.

The most important thing to do is to do something. You'll never be a real Jedi by wishing you had a light sabre. You'll never know more about God or have a real relationship with him by just thinking it would be a good thing. And if you get the wrong color or the wrong handle, keep looking and keep open - he'll make sure you get it right.

A Survivor Christmas

Last night was the finale of the 15th edition of Survivor, the reality tv show where contestants must outwit, outlast, and outplay their opponents to win $1 million while at the same time being dropped off in a remote jungle. Last night's winner was Todd Herzog, a 22 year old flight attendant from Utah. In all my years of watching the show, he probably played the best strategic game of all.

One thing that is always a constant in this show is the scheming that continually takes place on the cameras but not always in front of the other contestants. Part of that scheming is trying to determine against whom you will have the best chance of winning $1 million. In the end, people you may have lied to, tricked, etc. have to vote on whether or not you get the prize compared to the other one or two final contestants. In previous editions, there has been much talk about which contestant's life demonstrated a greater need for the big prize. This year was no different.

Enter Denise, a 40 year old happily married mother of three who works as a school lunch lady for $7 an hour. Or at least she did work as a school lunch lady. Upon returning from the show and to work, she lost her job because her employers felt her presence might be too disruptive to the school. She now works as a janitor. Denise had made it to the final four. Those four contestants had banded together early and stuck together all the way to the end. However, Denise was always at the bottom of the totem pole of four. When it came down to deciding which of these final four contestants would be voted off, the one contestant who held the swing vote regarding keeping Denise in the finals and giving her a chance at the prize deliberated continually over Denise's financial situation.

As I watched the moral quandry this contestant went through and what I believe to be real anguish on her face when the decision making time came, I began to think about what I would do in her situation. I would love to give Survivor a try sometime. If I was able to make it to this point, what would be the major factor in my decision? A lot of folks say they want to go to the end with the best in order to be competitive all the way to the end. Then again, $1 million is a lot of money. Would I be willing to lose it to someone who may need it a little more than I because it would be a wonderfully altruistic or compassionate thing to do, especially knowing that millions of people would be watching and evaluating my every word and action? Or do I want to come home with a lot of money because that is after all why I'm playing the game?

Which brings me to Christmas, believe it or not. Jesus did what was best for us. I don't believe Jesus would have been a contestant on Survivor: Dead Sea had he been given the chance. But I do know that he gave up a pretty high position of power, prestige, and reward because we needed it more. He was motivated by obedience to his heavenly father and love and compassion for us. It did not matter how much he would miss out on; it only mattered that we might be given a chance at eternity with his father in heaven.

Merry Christmas!

K.I.S.S.

It's time of the year where I ponder the material wealth that I possess. I am not rich by any means, but my family has more stuff than should be legal in the 48 continental United States. This time of year brings about such ponderance because Christmas is around the corner and that means my children get more stuff. Yea! Everyone needs more stuff! (sarcasm implied and intended)

The storage and maintenance of our stockpile of stuff is a constant topic of discussion for the wife and me. Because of everyone's busy schedules, we celebrated Christmas with my side of the family this past weekend. It did not dawn on me until we were leaving the house for the two hour drive to my mom's that I forgot the rent a U-Haul because most assuredly I would need one to get all the new stuff home. Luckily, we crammed it all in the back of the van and did not have to leave anyone behind in order to do so.

Saturday afternoon I spent a few minutes at my grandmother's. As I sat on the couch talking with her, I gazed around her house. Not much has changed in her home in the last 38 years. Some of the furniture has been swapped out. The pictures get rotated each each year as the great-grandchildren get older. Everything is pretty much the same - even the smell (and I love that smell).

I sat there reminiscing of my childhood days spent in the house. I remember the smell of coffee in the morning. I remember the taste of my own weakened cup of java she would make for me in the Yogi bear cup that had to stay at her house. I remember the tastes of the homemade biscuits she would make on Sunday afternoon and how she would always make one for me shaped like a stick man. My favorite sensory experience was always the taste and smell of the fried shrimp she would cook up for us.

As I allowed that flood of memories to sweep over me, I finished my visual survey of her home. I was struck with how simple it was. The house is not big by any means - three small bedrooms, 1100 square feet at best (and she raised five kids in that house, without indoor plumbing for many of those early years). I was amazed most at the lack of clutter, i.e. stuff, filling her home. If my memory serves me well, it's always been that way.

K.I.S.S. - Keep It Simple, Stupid. Those of us with too much stuff are probably stupid. I know I feel stupid. We need to be constantly reminded to live life more simply. I know that I wish I could squeeze my family into my grandmother's home and we all be happy about it. The simple life sure does look good.

Thank you Granny for the best gift I received this Christmas.

Excuses

Taking liberties with some movies and great works of literature, here's a burning question:

"O Blogger, Where Art Thou?"
"Bloggero, Bloggero, wherefore art thou Bloggero?"
"Are we blogging yet?"
"The Fall of the Blog: Star Wars Episode 7"

For the last few weeks, millions of people have not cared whether or not I have blogged. Tens of you have forgotten I even had one. Two of you have wondered when I'm going to get off my lazy butt and write something. For you two faithful fans, today is your lucky day. However, all I have are excuses for why I haven't posted very faithfully for a few weeks. These are in no particular order.

1. Too busy reading other people's blogs
2. After #1, I felt inferior to their witty humor, insightful societal or theological observations, or much more exciting lives
3. I've developed an allergy to Windows XP and unfortunately can't afford a new Mac right now
4. I'm just lazy
5. I decided to live my faith journey for a while instead of write about it
6. I'm recovering from my injuries suffered when the doors opened on Black Friday and I was trampled on my way to the half priced candy canes
7. I'm trying to watch as much tv as possible since the writers strike will force early reruns
8. I just can't seem to blog when the Panthers fall below .500
9. My fingers are too jumpy because of the increased sugar intake from all those candy canes
10. My brain is too dead because of repeated crashes after all my sugar rushes wore off
11. The weather is too crazy! It's 48 degrees one day and 70 the next!
12. Blog rhymes with eggnog and I just can't mix the two
13. Speaking of eggnog, I waited all night in the barn to see if the eggnog cow would see her shadow on Dec 2 and bring us eggnog this Christmas
14. Related to #12 & 13, I spent an inordinate amount of time wondering why eggnog is only on the shelves in December
15. I'm still trying to untangle all the stinking Christmas lights
16. Developed tennis elbow doing #15
17. Spent a lot of time wondering if what Tim Allen's character on The Santa Clause is true about Santa not visiting Muslim or Jewish children
18. Practicing Neptunesday really screwed me up for a while

If I can think of some more excuses, I'll put off writing for a few more days.

Just a thought.

To Choose or Not to Choose (part 2)

As promised earlier today, here are my second round of thoughts stemming from last week's After the Bachelor show. Be sure toread Al's, er, uh, I mean "Anonymous" comments for that post.
My purpose in writing this is not to bash Brad Womack, although he probably deserves it. I agree with Anonymous Al and all his comments. The little bit I've read about this guy confirms his cad status. I want to write about placing yourself in positions where making a choice, good or bad, is difficult and the situation could have been avoided.

Let's start with Mr. Womack, or anyone else playing the role of Bachelor or Bachelorette in search of a spouse. One has to take on a fairly selfish perspective to come along and choose from your own personal supermarket of potential spouses. It is preposterous in my mind to think that you can over the course of five or six weeks get to know one person over 14 others enough to seriously contemplate spending the rest of your life with him or her. The few times I've watched any of these shows, I've always been disturbed by the level of physical intimacy explored by the spouse hunter with every member of the harem.

Which leads me to a potential "blame the victim" label. The two women who were so hurt when Mr. Womack chose neither of them put themselves in a bad position. They committed way too much emotionally and physically to this guy, knowing full well that the other women were probably doing the same. He acted anything but gentlemanly with them, but they should had assumed the equal treatment going around.

Why do people put themselves in positions like this? This isn't about taking a risk in order to gain great rewards. Don't put yourself in a position where you can't make a good choice. When talking about a faith journey, there are so many ways to apply this. We tell people to flee temptation. The minute you feel like you could make a bad decision about anything, you should run the other way. Other people simply choose not to choose when it comes to faith. Of course, not choosing is still a choice.

Nothing profound here. I've probably waited too long to post again. Any profundity has grown cold. Moral of the story is don't put yourself in a position where you can't make a good choice.

Random thoughts for the day

I promise to post "To Choose or Not to Choose Part 2" within 24 hours (that would be 2:49 pm EST according to the time on the sanctuary computer, Thursday Nov 29) for those of you dying to read it. For now, here are some interesting and random thoughts I've been pondering today.

- Here's a link to a Brian Russell's sermon on compassion. I love the short prayer of Bob Tuttle he lists at the beginning. I really enjoyed hearing Tuttle's stories when I was a student, but this prayer is serious food for thought.

- Here's a link to Keith Drury's article on the extension of young adulthood. How much farther can it go?

- This morning our family devotions came from Ephesians 6:10-20. How do you talk about spiritual warfare with a 7 year old and a 9 1/2 year old? The warfare part was really cool to them - they are boys after all.

To Choose or Not to Choose (part 1)

This post is proof positive that it is better to go ahead and go to bed instead of channel surfing. Instead of making the better choice, I gave in to the temptation to watch a little tv before going to bed. I came across The Bachelor: After the Final Rose. Apparently, at the end of this season's matchmaking attempts, the producers were given an ending they never expected. Apparently, when the day of reckoning came, he did not choose either of the final two women. The links and comments on this are numerous. Here's a link to the Google search on "Brad Womack".

Having not watched the show at all and having only read about 30 lines of text regarding the show, I don't really have an opinion on the guy's decision. I did watch the final 30 minutes tonight where the two dissed women confronted him. And I did read enough after the show to find some evidence that the guy might be a cad.

Putting all judgments aside on this guy, I do want to address one thought I had while watching him squirm tonight. What an impossible situation to be in! First of all, there is nothing real about this reality tv show. The show's premise is that it's about how single men and women interact in the courtship process. But honestly, it looks more like the QVC of spouses. You have one person given fifteen possible mates that he or she has to narrow down to one over the course of about five weeks. It's hard enough to work through all the emotions of this with one person at a time, much less a dozen or more and to do so while the cameras roll.

I watched this guy struggle with justifying why he did (could not?) commit. How many times do we have difficulty making commitments when it comes to our faith journeys? Is it because we find ourselves in impossible situations or is it because of something else? How often do we put ourselves in "impossible" situations where our decisions impact our faith journeys?

I have a lot more similar questions and thoughts to add, but I really need to get around to making the right choice and get in the bed. Until I get around to posting part 2 of these thoughts, what are yours?

Give me a break!

I'm sorry, I just have to rant for a second. What should be a cause for celebration has turned into set of wacko advisories. The first two seasons of Sesame Street are now available on DVD. What could be better than that? Apparently, a lot of things. Those first two seasons have been deemed inappropriate for today's toddler - click here for the story.

Luckily, I can make up my own mind. I even bought my 7 year old son a real pocket knife for his birthday. Guess I'm either too stupid or too dangerous or maybe even both.

Who Cares?

Sunday the Houston Dynamo beat the New England Revolution to win their second consecutive Major League Soccer championship. Now let me say what 99.99% are thinking, "Who cares?" Probably none of you even knew there was a Major League Soccer league, much less that they had a championship game yesterday. I happened to come across while channel surfing during a football game. I saw it was soccer and kept on going. Only because it was a "by the way" comment during Sunday night's football game did I know the game was as significant as it was.

Neil Diamond has revealed the inspiration behind his number 1 hit Sweet Caroline. By the way, after forty years, it's working its way back up the charts. Who really cares?

A-Rod and the Yankees cut a new deal. He'll probably retire a Yankee. Even for die hard baseball fans, who really cares?

All of the above will make great answers for the 2007 edition of Trivial Pursuit or maybe win you a huge cash prize on the new game show sure to come out soon called Who Cares? . Perhaps the last two items are more noteworthy than the first because despite David Beckham, nobody really cares about soccer in this country unless their kid is playing it.

How many times have you oohed and aaahed over someone else's pictures of their grandchild when you really didn't care? How many times have you listened to someone spill their guts when you really didn't care? How many times has someone bored you with some story they though was just great but you thought, "I don't care!"? How many times have you been that someone?

I'll tell you who cares - good friends. Friends really do want to see all the new pics. Friends really do want to listen to you when you need it. I remember one time showing up unannounced at a friend's house at suppertime just to tell him some insight I had received while reading Ecclesiastes. It was during an especially vulnerable time in my life emotionally and spiritually. When it was over, I was pretty sure he probably thought "Who cares?" but I also know that he really did.

The best place to find friends like that is at church. They'll care about things that nobody else ever would. Friends at church will stick with you through things that no one ever would. At least they should.

God cares too. He may be busy keeping the universe going, but he also cares that your team won the MLS championship, that your favorite song was inspired by a president's daughter, and that someone with an overinflated ego may ruin the chemistry of your favorite baseball team. He cares about other stuff in your life too. While you're giving thanks for the many things in your life, remember he cares about everyone.

In Honor . . .

Today is when we take a day off to celebrate Veteran's Day despite what the calendar says the date is. Whether you honored the veterans Saturday, Sunday, or Monday, make sure you do. Saturday I was awestruck as never before on this holiday. My sons' Cub Scout Pack did their annual Veteran's Day project of placing flags on the graves of veterans. We began the morning with a short ceremony to honor the parents of any of the scouts who were veterans and paying tribute to all who have served our country.

After this very moving ceremony, the scouts dispersed to place the flags. I helped a group of the youngest scouts identify the appropriate graves for a flag. As we moved into an older section of the cemetery, the graves of veterans were more frequently found. We came across a whole section of WWII vets. Moving up the hill, the vets became thicker still. We had moved into a section of WWI vets. My older son was working in a newer section of the cemetery where the veteran graves were much farther apart.

It occurred to me why this is so. During the days of WWI and WWII, it was truly seen as a privilege and an honor to serve. It was seen as a duty to country. That's not the case anymore. It saddens me to view the current politicalization of how the military is viewed today. Since the Vietnam Conflict (is that PC term?), there have been many mixed feelings about how to view the men and women who serve in the Armed Forces and even more mixed feelings about the actions they are asked to take by their commanders. That's a shame. They deserve better. And we should still consider it our duty to serve. I hopefully will not die with many regrets, but having not served will probably be one of them.

To all the men and women who have served our country and are doing so, I salute you. Thank you for saying yes to the call of duty.

Broken Streaks

This has been the week for broken streaks. The Indianapolis Colts finally lost at home after 12 or 13 consecutive home victories. But even in their victory, the Pats were crying about "extra crowd noise" being pumped into the stadium. My streak of 8 consecutive wins at Free Cell on my office computer was broken as well. I was feeling like I was in the zone too, on my way to break my record streak of 16 wins. I guess I got overconfident and played a few bad cards.

Breaking a streak can have very consequential effects on our lives. Just ask people in the southeastern US what it's like to finally break the streak of rainless days and get some much needed water from the sky. Your checkbook can balance perfectly for months and then a careless error in the wrong column can crush your finances.

Sometimes the timing of the end of a streak is of more consequence than the actual ending itself. Just imagine if Cal Ripken, Jr. had suffered some injury that sidelined him just a few games away from breaking Lou Gehrig's record of 2,130 consecutive games played. Can you imagine being second on the list after almost twenty years of never missing a game? It would still be an accomplishment, but people would probably remember the injury more than the total.

Our ordinary lives are full of winning streaks that we don't notice until they are broken. We may not know that we have been happy for 187 consecutive days until something comes along to bring us grief. We usually don't realize that we have been "living on top of the mountain" of our faith journeys for 13 straight months until we have spent a week or two in the valley.

Honestly, we don't even think of our lives in terms of streaks so the metaphor may be a useless one. We do think of our lives in terms of good times and bad times, strong moments and weak moments. And we prefer for the good and strong to be longer in duration than the bad and weak. My thoughts for today are, "What do we do when the streak is broken?" What do YOU do?

The Not-So-Harsh Reality of Losing

Scan the television listings and you find 3 basic types of shows on the airwaves nowadays - karaoke gameshows, crime dramas, and reality tv. Several weeks ago while channel surfing in order to forcefully shut down all higher brain functioning for the day, I came across the reality tv show The Biggest Loser. The premise of the show is that between 15 to 20 extremely obese people compete to see who can lose the most weight. They are put into teams, given coaches and physical and dietary training. To make it exciting tv, they have to face challenges each week to make the process a little difficult and to also earn rewards. The show ends with the weigh-in. Each contestant steps on the scales to measure their weight change. The team that loses the lowest percentage of weight has to vote off one of their teammates, true to reality tv gaming.

I've never watched an entire episode of this show. I do, however, try to catch the weigh-in and voting at the end. They always show a picture of the person voted off today, compared to when they first came to the Biggest Loser complex. It's amazing the transformation each person has gone through.

Here's what I like about what little I've seen of the show. Unlike other reality tv game shows, the purpose of the game is to actually help someone out. You still have tempers flaring and interpersonal conflicts, but overall, the atmosphere is generally encouraging. These individuals have been selected because of their need to lose weight and their need for a better support system in order to do so. When it comes time for voting, there are genuine tears, unlike those found on those matchmaking shows. The rationale almost always given by the team as they explain the reason behind their vote is, "This person is strong and can make it happen when he/she gets home." It's like they do not want to put anyone in a situation where he/she won't succeed, despite how it might drag the team down.

Every time I have watched this happen, I have been amazed. I have been convicted. I have turned off the show wishing reality was actually like this, especially in the church. When you are on a faith journey, you want to be surrounded by people like this. Find a place where people can help you along your journey.

When you are on a faith journey, you also want to be that kind of support to others. You have a responsibility to help others on their journey. That's part of what Jesus meant when he said we had to lose our life to gain it. It's also what Paul meant when he said to look out for each other instead of looking out for ourselves. Losing doesn't sound so bad.

Just a thought.

change of thoughts

This morning I was going to write about marathons, Star Wars, and possibly misplaced squirrels. But something better came along. Together over breakfast, our family read the story about Paul at Athens. His description of what the Athenians called the "Unknown God" and who he knew to be the One true God really touched me. Here it is:

The God who made the world and everything in it is the Lord of heaven and
earth and does not live in temples built by hands. And he is not served by human
hands, as if he needed anything, because he himself gives all men life and
breath and everything else. From one man he made every nation of men, that they
should inhabit the whole earth; and he determined the times set for them and the
exact places where they should live. God did this so that men would seek him and
perhaps reach out for him and find him, though he is not far from each one of
us. 'For in him we live and move and have our being.' Acts 17:24-28

Have a great day. I pray you come to know this God if you don't already.

Deep Fried Fun

Yesterday my family and I were blessed through the benevolence of someone to enjoy the state fair. For reasons I do not completely understand, nor care to, this year's theme is "Seriously Twisted Fun". I think it involves corporate sponsorship with Subway and a few other marketing ploys. I think the theme should have been "Everything Deep Fried".

Everyone knows about funnel cakes and elephant ears, at least I'm assuming you do. For you international readers, these are basically pieces of dough, deep fat fried and then sprinkled with powdered sugar, cinnamon, fruit toppings, and or chocolate. Pardon my grammar as I speak in the language of the common man, but who don't want some of that? Funnel cake is some good eating though I myself have not had one in thirteen years. My last funnel cake experience was at a county fair and ended with a not so happy stomach. I stood in line for one yesterday and though I wanted one very badly, I found an excuse at the last moment to forego this culinary delight.

Some of you may have heard about how you can now buy deep fried candy bars. Everyone who buys one says they are wonderful, but honestly, are they really? This year saw the addition of the following items to the deep fried menu - Oreos, Twinkies, PB&J sandwiches, and even Coke. Yes folks, they are now deep frying Coke at the State fair. I was unable to get a demostration or sampling of this new phenomenon, so I have little to share with you other than its existence.

Now you know what I mean when I say the theme should be "Everything Deep Fried". I joked with some people in my church that next year we need to host a booth at the fair and sell something deep fried. I don't think it really matters what it is - people will buy it and eat it. Perhaps we can combine two other fair favorites and begin selling deep fried cotton candy and deep fried candy apples. Let's go all the way and deep fry those guys who try to guess your weight or age. Who wants a deep fried teddy bear for knocking over the milk bottles? How about a ride in the world's largest deep fryer?

Two questions come to mind as I ponder this deep frying craze. First, have you notice the conspicously absent word in that phrase "deep fried"? What's it deep fried in? Ten years ago we would have said "deep fat fried" but the health consciousness of society cannot tolerate that three letter word to be used anymore, despite what type of fat it may or may not be. Don't forget that KFC used to be "Kentucky Fried Chicken" not too long ago. Did they think we would forget it was fried if we didn't say it?

My second thought is actually more relevant to the purpose of this post. (and you thought there wasn't one!) Again I ask, is it really that good? I've never tasted one, but can a deep FAT fried Snickers bar be an improvement on the original or have we bought into the group consciousness and/or peer pressure and said, "Omigosh! This is so awesome. You have to try this." while simultaneously ignoring our other consciousness that says "deep FAT frying is bad"?

Now for the spiritual application (drumroll please) - How often do we see similar situations played out in the church? How many times do we go with the flow despite how wrong it may be or counterproductive it might be, but we continue course because the group consciousness says it's ok? Or how about those times when we refuse to go along with the group consciousness but we should be? How do you tell the difference in those situations? How often do we practice state fair theology that says its okay to go against what we believe is right in normal circumstances because we only do so once a year?

I could give you lots of answers but no one wants to spend 45 minutes reading anybody's blog, at least not mine. However, I bet you have some good answers that others might want to read. What are they? I'll be anxiously awaiting them while taking some more Tums and refilling the fryer.

Hope and Holes

Last night filled me with a little more hope for the future of our society. The kids and I watched Kid Nation. For those of you unfamiliar with this show, it's reality tv involving kids. Forty kids between the ages of 8 and 15 have been dropped off in a ghost town out west and they have to make society work. They have a town council, division of labor, etc. They do all the work.

Last night's episode dealt with matters of faith. Through cunning editing, we got to see kids from all different faiths argue about whose faith was best. The town council was given instruction to make time during the day for faith observances and a time of rest. They were given the option of either planning one service of the "one size fits all" type or organizing several different services. When the town council decided to "force" everyone to attend one service in order to learn about the faith of others, there was rebellion. More arguments ensued. No one attended the scheduled service.

However, later that night, right before lights out, a couple of kids organized a prayer vigil on their own. They went around inviting kids to gather around the fire for prayer if they wanted to, no pressure. An amazing thing happened. Due to camera angles, it was hard to see how many actually attended, but there seemed to be a lot of kids - Christian, Jew, Hindu, and even self-proclaimed atheists. The scene was so moving that one 12 year old boy broke down into tears at the expression of unity.

Things got more interesting the next day. At the regularly scheduled challenge that determines the social class of each group of kids there is also a chance to earn a town reward. Last night the choices were a mini-golf course to provide some entertainment OR a set of holy books - the Bible, the Torah, the Koran, etc. Much to my surprise, the kids overwhelmingly chose the set of holy books.

Several thoughts come to mind. I value diversity and try to be intentional about incorporating it. So did these kids but they resisted a politically correct attempt to force it on them. Good for them! They proved when given the chance, they would actually reach out to those around them in respect and genuine interest, as proven by the prayer around the fire.

I'm still trying to process the choice of the holy books over the mini-golf. It's hard to judge how much the books were actually read because we don't get to see everything that happens, only what the producers allow. Yet, we saw all the kids taking some kind of interest in the books. At different times thru the day, a group of kids could be seen taking time to read them. Deep down I want to believe that what we witnessed despite all the careful editing is an attempt to fill what has been called the "God-shaped hole" within all of us. St. Augustine is credited with first articulating this concept, though he put it much more elegantly -

"What place is there in me to which my God can come, what place that can
receive the God who made heaven and earth? Does this mean, O Lord my God,
that there is in me something fit to contain you? ... Or, since nothing that
exists could exist without you, does this mean that whatever exists does, in
this sense, contain you? If this is so, since I too exist, why do I ask you
to come into me? For I should not be there at all unless, in this way, you
were already present within me."

Just a thought.

Which one is wrong?

For those of you freaked and confused by The Matrix or afraid of anything post-modern, this may not be for you. As I drove to the office this morning, something just didn't feel right. Or look right. I couldn't decide which it was. The temps today are forecasted to be another record-breaking high of 94 degrees (yes that's right - 94!) but the leaves on the trees are all turning beautiful shades of red, yellow, and orange because the days are getting shorter. Which one is right?

I'll admit to being fairly ignorant of the names of all the philosophical schools of thought. I could not tell an existentialist from a Epicurean, though I could tell you what makes them tick after talking to one of them. Today is one of those days that makes you wonder metaphysically what is real - what I see or what I feel? I see fall coming - in the leaves and on the calendar. I feel summer in its prime. Somewhere out there is a school of thought with a name that talks about such questions.

Unlike yesterday's post, this one has a purpose and meaning. Our faith journeys are in many ways directed and interpreted by what makes us tick, by what our perspective on the world around us is. For some, matters of faith and how they serve God are dictated by how they feel. For others, it is determined by what they see. There will be times in life where these two will be stand in stark contrast and lead to very different outcomes. How then does one decide?

What do you do? Which guides you more? How do you choose which way to go? As you ponder these questions, put on a tank top, grab some ice cold lemondae, and go out and enjoy the changing leaves.

Hi, I'm Brett Favre

Last night as I struggled to stay awake during the second half of Packer-Bears football game, I realized something. I'm Brett Favre. No, I'm not having some kind of schizophrenic psychotic episode nor am I developing a dissociative identity disorder, confusing my real identity as the Marlboro Man with that of Brett Favre, starting quaterback of the Green Bay Packers and certain hall of famer. At one point during the game while the announcers were lauding Favre's ability, even at this stage in his career (this is his 17th season), they shared a quote from one of the Bears defensive players. This player had called Favre "an old Tony Romo". Translation - he is too old to be able to do the things he is doing. All the talk the last twelve months about Favre has centered around when he is going to finally retire.

As I listened to the announcers talk about Favre and his career accomplishments, I began to do the math. Brett (we're on a first name basis) and I are about the same age, but he looks WAAYYYY older than I. I looked up his birthdate, and to my surprise, I'm actually 6 months older than he. My age compared to all the famous people in the news lately has garnered much of my attention. When I look at all the hot stars in the music business or in Hollywood, they are all a lot younger than I. A few years ago I had the painful experience of going to the doctor for a checkup and discovering that my doctor was younger than I. When I think about the 2700 years of schooling required for such a position, it really made me feel old.

I know that I really am not all that old. In fact, if not for the peach fuzz I mistakenly call facial hair, I would look more like a college student. But one cannot help but examine one's life, wondering if it has amounted to anything, or if anything is left ahead to do. I've already begun accumulating my list of things I wish I had done. Things like actually listening to all those financial advisors and opening an IRA when I was 22 or serve in the military when I had the chance.

They say that the more you learn the more you realize you don't know. They also say there is no shortcut to wisdom. I have been privileged to meet some men who have pastored for forty-five or more years. We don't listen to those men enough because "they're not in touch with today's world". Maybe they're not. Just because they don't have an iPod though doesn't mean they can't help you navigate through life.

So what does any of this have to do with me thinking I'm Brett Favre? Nothing really. You're just reading the meandering thoughts of a once brilliant mind going dim with age. You are participating in the angst of someone wondering if his life has really mattered up to this point. You are peeking over the shoulder of someone who is feeling a little goofier than usual today and also knows that there is lots of time ahead to do whatever he wants. And you're also being asked to pray for the Carolina Panthers. I really want to return to the Superbowl and live up to all the pre-season hype again.

Just a thought. Now, I challenge you to find some coherent way to comment on these mumblings. This is Brett Favre signing out.

Eight Days a Week

No, this is not a post about the Beatles, though their hit with the same title is nice little sing along (lyrics here). BTW, this was a single release only in the US, but enough about the Fab Four. I've decided I want a new calendar. Contrary to popular belief, the 365 day calendar we so enjoy with its quadrennial leap year is not the only calendar in use today. We may have clocked it "perfectly" in terms of our position relative to the sun and other stars, but some cultures and other parts of nature refuse to abide by such constraints. For instance, I learned yesterday that Muslims utilize a 354 day calendar to mark their religious celebrations. The moon, and many women with it, operate on a 28 day month.

So, I've decided I will start utilizing an eight day week. This will accomplish two things. It will give me an extra day on the weekend and it will give me an extra day each week to think of something to post here, assuming I keep to a regular Monday morning posting schedule. Now the logistics of such a change have to be worked through.

First, I have to decide what I will call my eighth day. I'm thinking about something totally boring and mathematical like Octoday. Or I can go with something more creative and relate it to Roman mythology and call it Neptunesday (after Neptune). That's actually not a bad idea because Neptune is the eighth planet and Octoday makes me think about an octopus which lives in the sea and Neptune was the god of the sea. Okay, Neptunesday it is.

Second, where do I place this eighth day? Do I insert it between Saturday & Sunday OR after Sunday. We still consider Sunday the first day of the week, but when you look at work calendars, at least in western society, many times, Saturday and Sunday are squished together in one block at the end of the week, making Monday the first day on the far left.

Third, how will this affect my interactions with the rest of society? My church expects me to show up on the first day of their old-fashioned seven day week and give a sermon. And what if I want to get a Chick-Fil-A sandwich on Neptunesday, but it just happens to fall on the Sunday of a seven-day week? They'll be closed. Extended family gatherings during the holidays might become an issue too unless they realize how much better the eight day week with Neptunesday really is.

Looks like the world will have to be changed. What do you think? Is it worth the headache? I'm pretty certain that an eight day week won't catch on. Maybe Neptunesday isn't worth the headache, but some things are. Matters of faith and how a faith journey shapes your life certainly are. Even how we do church is worth changing if it means we will grow in our relationships with God and it allows us to connect more people to a faith journey.

What are the things relating to our faith and church in particular that are worth changing, but might create a little havoc initially as you try to coordinate with the old way of doing things?

Did you hear that pt2

Staying with the theme from last week's post, let's talk about the need for an interpreter. When I lived in the inner city, I had a lot of contact with Hispanic immigrants. There was a large population of Hispanic people in my neighborhood. The school where I taught had a lot of Hispanic students. I heard everything they said perfectly fine. I understood very little though. I needed an interpreter. Of course, the more time I spent in these kind of conversations, the more I began to understand. But I never reached a point where I could make it without an interpreter.

Hearing from God is like that. The more you hear from him, the more you are able to understand on your own. However, there are some things you just want to verify that you are understanding correctly. It may be really big decisions. It may be that even though you are 99% positive you have heard correctly, there isn't any peace about the decision. That's where it's good to have an interpreter to consult.In fact, it's good to have several interpreters. Friends you can trust with the details. Friends you can trust to listen to God with you.

I've been using some interpreters myself lately. I'm glad I have them because I don't want to give somebody a big yellow pencil when they are trying to tell me they are having a heart attack.

In the news today

Here's a sample of interesting news that caught my eye today. Some are worthy to ponder, others are just for a good laugh.

God gets sued (be sure to read the whole article)

QB testifies to miracle from God

Meteorite causes sickness

BoSox rookies get hazed (you'll have to wait thru a 15 sec commercial)

Feel free to comment on any of these. Have a great day.

Did you hear that?

I was brushing my teeth this morning when I thought I heard my phone ring. That happens frequently because I use an electric toothbrush. Sometimes when I turn it up to extreme super max high speed with the grinding wheel so I can really polish my molars, it creates a ringing in my ears. I turned off the toothbrush and listened more closely and realized it was just the ringing inside my skull created by the 100,000 rpm motion of the toothbrush head.

By now you've probably heard about the mosquito ringtone you can download for your cell phone. We all know that as we get older certain parts of our body do not function as well. Our ears are two of those parts. The internal parts of our ears become less sensitive to higher frequency noises as we age. Someone has done the research and found out a frequency that teens can hear but adults cannot. I've been to the website above and tested it myself. My kids could indeed hear what I could not.

This morning as I was hearing things I didn't really hear and pondering things I couldn't hear, I began to think about hearing God. Most people are afraid to say, "I heard God speak" for fear of being locked away someplace where you can't hurt anyone. Most of the time it is true that when we "hear" God it is more like a feeling that we know what we are supposed to go and do, say, stop, or whatever. There have been times in my life where I knew what God was saying to me but pretended it was something else because I didn't want to do the thing he said. Those times usually don't end well until you turn it around. Luckily, I eventually turned it around.

There are other times where we misunderstand God or just hear him wrong. On a few occasions, my wife and I have stepped out in faith to do something we just postively knew was something God had told us to do. Halfway through the endeavor it became obvious we needed to turn around or just stop the thing altogether. The question then became, "How did we misunderstand? Will we ever be able to understand and know for sure what we are supposed to do?"

Misunderstanding/mis-hearing will go a long way in making you gun shy in the future. It certainly has for us. So what do you do? One of things you can do is bounce it off your friends who are on the same faith journey as you. Ninety-nine percent of the time they'll be able to help you discern if you are doing the right thing. You can always compare it to things you thought you heard in the past; for example, ask yourself, "Is this something that is out of character for what I know about God?"

Sometimes you just aren't going to know until you step out. When you do, don't worry if you discover that you may have misunderstood. Remain faithful on your journey - that's what he's measuring anyway. Above all else, keep listening because he will speak to you.

Now, I wonder what would happen if I hooked my toothbrush up to my car battery?

Secrets Revealed

Last night I watched a show that revealed all the secrets to how magicians, or more appropriately called illusionists, do their tricks. The Masked Magician revealed the secrets for everything from pulling a rabbit out of a hat to cutting a woman in half to making an elephant disappear. Some of the secrets I had suspected. Others were new.

Here's the disappointing part. Now I won't be able to enjoy myself the next time I see an illusionist perform. I'll know how he does it. It will be like that first holiday you discovered that all its characters were not real (I'm writing in code for all our young readers!). All the mystery will be gone, just like that 7000 pound elephant.

How many of us have become disillusioned on our faith journeys because the mystery was gone? I know some for whom their faith never had any mystery about it and it worked for them. They were strict rationalists. Some have argued people like that have a dead faith, but I would not dare try to judge such a thing in a person's life.

Personally I need some mystery - that's why I'm a mystic. I don't mean mystic as in mixing eastern religious chants and other non-Christian practices and philosophies with my faith. I mean mystic in the sense that I can feel the presence of the Holy Spirit; mystic in the sense that I have peace in the face of adverse circumstances and I can't explain why; mystic in the sense that I know exactly what God is saying to me at that moment.

Which leads me to other thoughts - what would it take to remove the mystery from my faith? Is mystery even an appropriate element in our faith? What do you think? Now, if you will excuse me, I'm going to go saw one of my kids in half.

Remembering . . .

Last week was filled with one story after another about Princess Di. It was the tenth anniversary of her tragic death. I remember exactly where I was when I found out. I might even be able to remember what I was wearing. I do know I was at church the morning after, attending services at Brick by Brick UMC in Lexington, KY.

It's amazing how things get rooted in your memory. Tragic events have a way of doing that to you. I remember where I was and what I was doing when Elvis died, Reagan was shot, the shuttles Challenger and Columbia exploded, and of course 9/11. Many people from generations before me remember details about Vietnam, Pearl Harbor, and even the stock market crash of 1929.

The media was filled with stories about Princess Di last week. All her good qualities were noted and memorialized. It made me think about how I will be remembered after I'm gone (which I hope is a long time from now). I know that there are some mistakes, poor choices, character flaws, and misunderstandings that some will remember. I hope the majority of what is remembered will be the good things that I have done. People even talk about the good things Nixon did nowadays.

Above all else, I hope that my faith journey is the dominant memory people have of me. I hope that people think of me and say it was obvious that I loved God will all my heart, soul, mind, and strength. I hope they say I loved my neighbor as myself.

Of course, fifty years after I'm gone, unless I become really famous for something, there will be very few people who will remember me. That's where it's important to have invested in other people's lives. Someone will remember them one day and if we live in such a way as to inspire them to live their own faith journey so that they are totally committed to God, then in an indirect way, we are remembered. That's all that's really important anyway.

Just a thought.

Random Acts of Friendship

I received a gift last night. It was a brand new, never before used, freshly shipped still in the box beverage glass with the Camel cigarette logo etched beautifully on the side. I was somewhat perplexed at the meaning, so I asked my gift-giving friend the meaning behind his generosity. He explained with a smile that it was a "man's glass". I guess he is equating Joe Camel with The Marlboro Man. My wife and I got a good laugh out of it. We were also advised to tell our children that it was the camel belonging to Moses if asked.

Last week another friend called me from Wal-Mart. He said, "Guess what I'm looking at?" Having absolutely no idea, I gave up. He then said excitedly, "I'm looking at a whole display of Peter Pan peanut butter." I thought to myself, "How cool is that? My friend knows enough about my addictions that he is looking out for me!" I still haven't bought any yet. I'm waiting for the reduced fat stuff to come out. If it doesn't come out soon though I'll buy the full fat stuff.

If there is something major going on in my life - good or bad, I have friends who will call to check up on me and see how I'm doing. Many times this summer I've commented at how good these friends are.

This would be a good time to get real cheesy and start humming "Friends" by Michael W. Smith. The refrain says "Friends are friends forever when the Lord's the Lord of them". I have found that to be true. It really is more than a cheesy song used to illicit tears on the last night of camp or other youth-related retreat thing.

And you already know that friends are important to our faith journeys. Not just for the accountability piece. It's good to just have fun and friends on your journey. I hope you have some to journey with you. Thanks guys for being part of mine.

Hell Revisited

Well, let's hope you aren't really revisiting hell, or have even visited hell the first time. One would think that after going there once you would not choose to go back. In the spirit of my previous post relating to dialog, I feel the need to clarify my thoughts about hell and its place in our journeys. I encourage you to check out the comments here and here before reading any further (or is farther? maybe someone will dialog and help me get it straight which it is).

Hell is something to be avoided, that's for sure. I do not think it is something to avoided in talking about out faith journeys. In Losing or Winning, I reference the rewards of entering into a faith journey. It must also be understood that these rewards are not options. It is not a case of "I don't really want a glorified body and all that. Is there a cheaper package I can get?" There really are only two options - ALL or NOTHING, Heaven or hell.

The second option has to come into play at some point. In What exactly is a faith journey, I reference the fact that sin has us on a path that takes us away from God. What I do not say in that post is where exactly it takes us. Some readers will immediately recognize this and be quick to point it out as a shortcoming. Maybe so. But, I think the discerning reader and the person whom the Holy Spirit may be working with will be able to fill in that blank. It's an obvious question that most will ask, whether aloud or internally.

Timing is everything. For some people, they will understand and respond to the hell option much more quickly and receptively than others. Other people will need to hear about the heaven option first before they can understand the hell option. My issue with the "avoidance of hell" methodology is that is all some ever talk about. It is many times presented as the "You can passively choose hell by not choosing God. Don't worry about the joyful things that come from choosing God. Let's just get you out of the fire."

Just a thought.

Blogging - the good, the bad, and the ugly

As I was sitting around this morning trying my best to avoid doing anything productive because that would require work, I had a few thoughts about blogging. These thoughts are generated in large part as a result of the comments (few as they are) given to some of my posts. In the spirit of a good spaghetti western, let's look at the good, the bad, and the ugly in reverse order.

First the ugly. It can get brutal out there. Some people like to blog so they can rant and rave about all that is not right in the world, rarely providing any solutions but often telling others how wrong they are. Sometimes people like to leave comments on the blogs of others, writing in a tone that is anything but civil, inviting harsh disagreement, battles, and many times taking on the form of personal attacks. I've only been blessed with such a response once or twice, but I know a few guys whose blogs get hit 1000's of times each week and the comments often fall into this category.

Blogging can be bad because unless you want to post a 200 page dissertation, it can be hard to post all your thoughts in their fully explained form. You just post and hope people figure it out. Or, those who don't know you may read your stuff and miss out on the underlying assumptions you as the writer thought were there.

Some of the stuff you find out there is just plain bad. The going joke nowadays is, "I read it on the internet. It must be true." Some people post as satire. Some post really believing what they have written is true, but may be way of base. You might think this blog falls into category, which leads me to what is good about blogging.

Blogging can lead to good dialog. I've enjoyed participating in dialog with people all around the world that was not possible before the advent of our current technical living space. Dialog is good because it provides additional perspectives and even correctives to things. Dialog allows those who miss the underlying assumptions to clarify the confusion. Dialog enables the writer to hit on those omissions from his dissertation when necessary.

Blogging at its ugliest, worst, and best illustrates our faith journeys. We've all encountered those individuals who are extremely hostile to things of faith. At times the world around us makes a faith journey difficult, whether it does so passively or actively. There is also some really bad info out there about our faith journeys. Which is why good dialog is necessary for our faith journeys. We need to see other perspectives. We need to receive and issue correctives. We need to get further clarification on what something means.

How have you experienced the good, the bad, and the ugly on your faith journey?

Losing or winning?

Merv Griffin died this weekend. The late night news began its report on Merv by saying, "Merv Griffin died this weekend, finally losing his battle against prostate cancer." I immediately thought, "Did he really lose?" In the church, we rarely say someone "lost" when they die of some disease. We usually say, "Their battle ended." Why? Despite our grief at having lost a loved one, we believe that person, if on a faith journey, actually wins the greatest prize of all.

Last week I cautioned against using "avoidance of hell" as the primary reason/method by which to encourage someone to begin their faith journey. I still stand by those thoughts. It is true that at some point you have to understand the reality of hell as part of your faith journey, but does it have to be the main thing you understand? What about the benefits of being on a faith journey? What about the fact that in heaven, you are in a place where you receive a new body, just like the one Christ received at his resurrection that will never need repair, never grow old, never suffer aches or pains? What about the reality that in heaven there is no sorrow, no grief, no emotional disorders or mental illness? What about the joy of knowing that you get to be in the actual, physical, and literal presence of the God who created the universe and you get to do so forever? That sounds a lot like winning to me, regardless of how it phrased by the people of this world.

There are lots of other ways to talk about losing and winning on our faith journeys. Maybe that's something for my next set of thoughts. For now, think about what you win on your faith journey.

Is it love?

Monday night, all our cynicism was confirmed. Those of us who are cynics will merely say that reality was confirmed. Thirty year old tennis star Mark Phillipousis chose the 25 year old Amanda over the 48 year old Jen on NBC's The Age of Love. For those of you who haven't heard about the reality show universe that dominates our television screen, this was (another!) show where a good looking, extremely eligible(rich!) bachelor agrees to pick a potential spouse from a group of women he's never met before. Every few days, he has to send one home as he gradually narrows the choices down. It takes approximately four weeks of real world time that is then cut and edited into eight to thirteen weeks of tv. In this version, a group of 40+ year olds were pitted against a group of twenty somethings. Does love really overlook age?

It seems every network has some version of this now. ABC started it all with The Bachelor. The first match up didn't work out, but when they did The Bachelorette, it turned out to be a match made in heaven. I don't remember their names, but the pretty blonde bachelorette picked her dream husband from the group and for over a year, America watched their wedding plans take shape and finally their wedding. I assume they're still together because all my entertainment mags and online subscriptions haven't told me otherwise. Which reminds me, I better renew now so I can keep up with Nicole's pregnancy and receive hourly updates on the rumored trouble in the Bradgelina home. But I digress.

Every one of these shows ends with the jilted and no longer potential paramour crying. Their final words usually go like this, "I know we only had one conversation and it was about the benefits of self-clumping kitty litter, but I KNOW he was the one. Why couldn't he see that we were made for each other? But I love him so much, I just hope he is happy." There are several things about these shows I do not understand. (You, in turn, may not understand why I watch them - I don't. I get the fifteen minute synopsis after the grand finale) First, why would you participate in a modern day harem to find the love of your life? The bachelor or bachelorette that is doing the choosing is basically making out with all the other contestants every chance possible. The second thing I cannot understand is how can you "fall in love" in such a short time and shallow circumstances?

At the end of Monday's finale, Jen, the 48 year old, was of course in tears. I'm paraphrasing here, but she essentially said, "You know, one time I was cyncial like that Matt Guthrie guy. I used to watch these shows and say, 'Give me a break. Those can't be real tears!' But now I know differently. My emotions are real. I know how strongly I feel about Mark right now."

I tried to compare Jen's experience with my own. I fell in love with my wife pretty quickly. We had only been dating about two weeks when I told her, "I think I'm falling in love." We "agreed" that we were working toward marriage in only two months and made it publicly official with a ring after four and a half months. The difference is I had known her for over two years when we started dating. I also did not have to compete with twelve other guys simultaneously, although there is that Christmas party incident before we started dating where I was ready to show some other guy I could whip his butt if necessary for the exclusive rights to her attention.

What do shows like The Age of Love and all its siblings tell us about our society and ourselves? I think it shows how desperate we are for love. I don't mean this as a characterization of the men and women on these shows. I mean it as a commentary on love's absence from our lives. We all, to quote the Foreigner hit from the '80s, "want to know what love is."

Real love is possible and it can change your life. If you're on a faith journey, you will be experience real love. It may not be the syrupy or sentimental kind, but it is a love that will never leave you. Your faith journey is only possible because love won out over our sinfulness. When we journey together properly, we don't just get it from above. We will experience that love through the people around us. You will find yourself giving it as much if not more than you are taking.

Love is a beautiful thing, and yes it is real.

New Link

I've inserted a new link over on the righthand side of the page - Asbury Bloggers Society. I hope they'll include me. Pick me! Pick me!

I think it is the equivalent to the Skull and Bones society at Yale. Except without all the cool things like secret hand shakes, extreme partying, past, present and future presidents, one-world government end time connections and conspiracy theories. There are some interesting posts to be found though.

Feeling the Heat

This week promises to be a scorcher. Temps are forecasted to break 100 in my neck of the woods. All last week they hovered around the triple digit mark. We've been carefully planning our daily activities to avoid the heat of the day whenever possible. Overall the summer hasn't been that bad. I've seen a lot worse. The humidity rose substantially a few weeks ago, but again, this has been a pretty cool summer, no pun intended.

All this heat reminded me of a saying I heard a while back. "It's hot, but Hell's hotter. Don't go there." It was said in jest and yet it was also obvious to anyone listening that the person saying this was giving a half-hearted suggestion to whomever might be listening that eternal damnation in the lake of fire was something to be avoided. I believe this person spoke with all sincerity in his concern for someone's soul. Many of us have been exposed to the sincere efforts of someone (whether a "professionsal" evangelist or just a friend) to scare us into Heaven.

I believe in a literal Hell that fits all the descriptions you would expect a preacher to believe in. However, I'm not sure how effective or even appropriate such an approach is to helping someone see the need to be on a faith journey. There is a time and place where the reality of Hell needs to be discussed. I just don't believe it's at the beginning of the journey.

Lots of people interpret such tactics as intimidation. I've heard countless stories from people very dear to me who feel bitter resentment at such an approach being used on them. They sincerely believed all that was being said to them but something in the approach and forcefulness of the speaker left a bitter taste in their mouths that caused them to turn back later. Some people have galvanized their resistance to Christianity because of it.

Some of the people reading this aren't going to like it. I'm going to be accused of watering down the Gospel. My faith is going to be questioned. That's ok. If you visit here frequently and read the comments of others, you'll know I get hit from both sides of the fence. So for those of you who disagree, be kind and comment appropriately. For all of you, I'd like to hear about your experiences with someone trying to tell you about the need for a faith journey. Was it positive or negative and why? If you said "Yes", why? If you said "No", why? I'll be here looking for a cool spot while I wait.

Relationships anyone?

No, this is not an indication that I am now running an online dating service. But it will give you an idea of where this post is heading. It all started last Wednesday night (cue strumming harps and wavy pictures as we enter memory mode) . . .

The family and I went to see the Durham Bulls play Wednesday night. They're the triple-A affiliate of the major league baseball Tampa Bay Devil Rays. Minor league ball games are always great places to take the family because they really cater to families, providing lots of wholesome, family friendly entertainment. The level of play, at least in Durham, is usually pretty good and the park is just the right size so that there are no bad seats in the place. unless you're in the outfield. I don't care how small the park, if you're in the outfield, it's never a good seat. But I digress.

As the game was beginning, five women and a toddler came and sat two rows ahead of us. My wife and I waited a few minutes, looking for the men to show up. This was afterall a sporting event. Not that women can't enjoy sports, but usually when given a night out, women don't choose the ball park. No men ever showed up. It became clear it was just these ladies, enjoying a night out, even if they had one kid in tow.

At the end of the second inning, another peculiar thing happened. All five got up together and left. Lest you think I'm being chauvinistic or at least stereotypical in my judgments, my wife was the first to say, "I guess they've had enough." I joked and said maybe they had to go to the bathroom. I guess the same rule applies to the concession stand because within minutes, they returned, each with food and drink.

During the slow parts of the game, I watched the women interact. They appeared to be enjoying the game but they appeared to be enjoying one another's company more. Throughout the game, they would switch seats with one another in order to be able to converse with a different person. Guys don't do that. We stay where we are and just shout over the five people between us when we want to speak to the guy on the end. That works for us, so it's ok. Don't judge us ;-)

It's widely talked about that women are better at relationships than men. I'm not ready to agree 100% with the notion that men stink at relationships. We just do it differently. What these women did illustrate and remind me of though was the importance of healthy relationships, however you maintain them. (Healthy is the key word there) When you are on a faith journey it is important to maintain healthy relationships with other people also on a faith journey. That does not mean to restrict those relationship building times to church, Bible study, or some other "spiritual" thing. Going to a ball game, fishing, playing ball, seeing a movie, scrapbooking, sharing a meal. . . anything that gets you doing life together is important and will have immeasurable benefits.

So, anyone up for some relationships?

This stuff is harder than it looks

Last week I was lucky enough to take a few days vacation at the beach with the family. I was also unlucky enough to have leave in the middle due to a conference I had to attend while they stayed for the whole week. Oh well, you win some, you lose some. As a whole, though, the week was pretty restful and I certainly needed that.

On Tuesday the boys and I decided to try our hand at fishing off the pier. They seemed excited about it and it would give me a chance to hone my Marlboro Man skills. We rented a couple of rods, bought some bait, and headed to end of the pier with dreams of bringing home supper that night. My youngest son aspired to catching a killer whale. After about fifteen minutes of sitting there waiting for a bite, the boys started to get bored. I tried to explain that sometimes the biggest part of fishing is waiting. Within twenty minutues, one of them was ready to call it quits. And he did. After forty-five minutes, the other one threw in the towel. They went back to the camper with their mom and I stayed for another hour or so with two rods all to myself.

I came home empty handed. As I looked around me, nobody else was catching any fish either. Well, almost nobody. Two guys behind me kept catching fish. They did not always catch a keeper - one time it was a sting ray. Another time it was a toad fish. Another time it was a ribbon fish (this was kept for bait). But at least they were catching something. I looked at their rods. I looked at their tackle. I looked at the water they were casting into. For the most part, they were not doing anything any different than the other fifty or so people on the pier, yet they were the only ones reeling in fish.

Now, I have to ask the obvious question - Why? Is it because they were indeed smoking Marlboro's? Other people were smoking - maybe they had the wrong brand. That's probably not it. Was there something subtle they knew that the rest of us did not? My brother-in-law works for Hendrick Motorsports. He gave me a tour of the engine department. He explained that cameras are forbidden there because a trained mechanic could look at a casual photo and examine it to discover some trade secrets. All I saw was a bunch of metal being bored, ground, and molded into engine parts. Maybe all this is harder than it looks.

Here comes the real question that I know you are just waiting for. What if our faith journeys are the same? Is a faith journey harder than it looks? Yes and No. When we begin a faith journey, God helps us all along the way to stay on that journey and live for him. At the same time, it's not as simple as baiting a hook and throwing it overboard. There are skills and techniques that we must learn and develop along the way. Things like prayer and Bible reading are the most basic and probably most important. Sometimes they are really easy. Sometimes we have to work at it.

Now I pose a question for you. What part of your faith journey has been harder than it looked? Think about it. For now, I'm going to go see if I can improve my luck with some worms. I hope changing bait will work because I don't want to take up smoking. Just a thought.

Why am I awake?

It's 1:00 am and I'm not asleep. WHY?! I was really tired when I went to bed over 2 hours ago. I even fell asleep pretty quickly. My wife came to bed about an hour later and I woke up enough to roll over. And lie there awake. And roll back over and lie there awake. And then roll back over and lie there awake.

After 20 minutes of this, I decided to get up, check my email and check on some items I have up for sale on ebay (some vintage gen 1 Transformers that have been in storage for 20 years). Lest you think I am violating the principles of last week's post, let me explain. I got up because I know how this works. Unless I am completely exhausted, twenty to forty minutes of sleep will make my body feel likes its completely rested and ready to go. Such is the case tonight. As I type this, my mind is tired, my eyes are itchy & burning, and I hope to sleep soon if the rest of my body will cooperate.

Somewhere in this is a spiritual lesson. Like a lot of things, we want the quickest, shortest, easiest route. Those aren't always the best. I may be able to go on spurts of 30 minute naps, but eventually I will pay the price. OR the lesson may be that I am too impatient and needed to give it more than twenty minutes before giving up. There's truth in that also. OR just maybe there's no lesson at all. I could just be a guy who can't sleep and is filling his time with ramblings about his sleep patterns that nobody else cares about. Maybe there are some things in life where there are no spiritual applications. Those are my random thoughts at 1:12 am in the morning. What are yours?

I'm Back!

It's good to be home. I spent the last two weeks directing camp for 1st thru 6th graders. Click here to see some of the pics. It was a great two weeks being part of the faith journeys of 331 kids, but like I said, it's good to be home. It's good to get some rest.

Rest is an important part of our faith journeys. God didn't take a day off because he ran out of things to do. He modeled something important for us. If we don't rest, we eventually fall apart. I know a college professor at a Christian college who routinely tells his students to go get some sleep when they come to him with spiritual problems. It's amazing how a lack of rest adversely affects our decision making, even in spiritual matters.

On at least two occasions in my life, a lack of rest became a serious issue. In the fall of 2001 I hit the brick wall of burnout from not managing the many items on my plate in a healthy manner. It took several months for me to recover emotionally and spiritually from that time. Two weeks ago, as the first week of camp begin, I was teetering on the brink of going to a similar place. I had been averaging about 4 hours sleep per night over the last six months. What made this time end differently was the presence of friends who cared about me and were willing to take the reins. I gave them the director's hat and left camp for a day. I checked into a hotel and slept til almost noon the following day.

We underestimate the value of rest in anything we do. God wants us at our best, not our worn out, barely hanging on selves. As you journey, take a look at your struggles. Do you need some rest? Who can take the reins for you so you can? Just a thought.

Not Alone part 2

A friend of mine who knows I'm preparing to run a half marathon is working hard to make sure I'm prepared. He's the only person who asks me regularly how my running is going. He keeps volunteering to run with me because he plans to run as well. Problem is this guy is like a machine. He works out all the time. He lies down on the floor while the kids from church all jump up and down on his stomach and he never flinches. He even offered to run at my pace. When he told me what his "slow days" were, I 'bout had a heart attack. If I want to survive to run in November, I need to get in better shape before running with this guy.

Running is one of those things I've always done alone, except when I coached high school cross country. Then I would run with my team. Most of them had no idea how hard I struggled to keep up with the best. Luckily I had the excuse of having to hold back to keep the rear half moving. I really do want to run with my friend because I know that I will get in shape a lot faster with him pushing me. I just worry about surviving the pushing!

My faith journey has always benefitted when I "ran" with someone who was much better than I. I could watch their lives and see how they handle things. I could learn to "do" things like them. I can look back and see how I grew.

There have been times where someone wanted to "run" with me so they could grow in their faithi journeys. It was an honor and privilege to be part of their spiritual growth. I had to be careful not to push them too hard beyond what they were capable of. That is not always easy to determine as a coach. Many times those of us with more experience forget that we had to work ourselves into spiritual shape.

How is your running going? Who do you need to begin training with, either for your benefit or theirs? Just a thought.

I'm Not Alone

A couple of weeks ago, I was talking with some people about one of my favorite things in the whole world - peanut butter. I was lamenting the continued absence of my brand of choice - Peter Pan reduced fat crunchy. In fact, there is no Peter Pan to be found of any type. I know I've ranted about this before, but this has got to stop. I need my peanut butter. I haven't found any other brand that I like.

An interesting thing happened. In the small group of about twenty that I was speaking to, several heads began to nod in sympathy, no make that empathy. We all shared our frustration with the long wait we are enduring for the creamy crunchy nectar of heaven made by Peter Pan to return to the shelves. They too had tried other brands and the other brands had come up short. I learned I was not alone. The five or six of us continued to talk off to the side about our woes with regards to our forced abstinence from one of our favorite foods.

It is good to discover you are not alone in your suffering, especially in more serious matters. After suffering through occupational burnout and a near nervous breakdown, I was surprised and relieved to discover just how many of my colleagues had gone through similar experiences. Even though I was well into my recovery at the time, it was encouraging to learn that my experience was somewhat normal. It is always amazing to watch the look on someone's face when they are sharing their troubles and someone else comes along and says, "Me too!"

I've said this before, but it's worth saying a thousand more times, this is one of the reasons you should never journey alone. We need to find others that will journey along the path of faith with us. They will be able to say, "Me too!" when times get hard and their experiences can become learning tools and support for us. We can "pay it forward" by doing the same for someone else down the road. Everyone benefits when they do it together. Just a thought.

Yard Work revisited

This morning I mowed most of my yard. I only mowed most of it because my oldest son is at the age where he wants to start mowing the lawn. Right now it only appears to be cool. I'm sure it won't be long before the coolness wears off this chore. I saved him a small patch on the corner for him to begin practicing his skills with the push mower. Tonight, after supper, he will make his lawn mowing debut. It may even turn out to be the beginning of every boy's first paying job - mowing the neighborhood lawns.

But my son's debut is not what prompted this thought. The last time I mowed, I noticed something about how I felt. I've posted before how I felt about doing yard work - here and then again here and finally here. In that last post I really lamented the lawn mowing chore at our previous house. I don't have those feelings of dread when I mow my current lawn. And I have approximately twice as much lawn now.

The difference is in the equipment. Before, all I had a was 22 inch push mower. Now I am using a big ol' John Deere 48 inch self propelled mower. This is a real man's mower. I bet the Marlboro man uses one of these when he mows his lawn around the campsite. Someone who used to have a lawn maintenance business was kind enough to let me borrow this machine he no longer uses until I can get my own. It's amazing what having the right equipment will do to change your attitude toward a task.

Lots of us are stuck in jobs or situations we hate because we feel ill-equipped for the task at hand. Or we feel like we are expected to do something without the proper tools. Living a faith journey can sometimes be like that. We get intimidated by the perfect ideal set of expectations that seem impossible to fulfill. The good news is that God equips us for the journey. He doesn't want us to hate the yard work. He wants us to enjoy the manly pleasure of a huge piece of yard machinery. Well, maybe not that, but he does want us to enjoy and be successful along the journey. That why he gives us his Holy Spirit.

I'm glad he equips us. I've found myself in situations far bigger than me on lots of occasions. Without his equipment, I don't know what I would have done. Now, if my son can become fully equipped and capable soon . . . .

Can you hear me now?

For the past several weeks, I feel like I've been bombarded with the same message from God. Actually two different messages. I'm one of those people who actually believes I've heard the voice of God. I don't mean in the whisper of the wind or the beauty of a sunset. On a few occasions I'm 99.9999% sure that the audible voice spoken for me alone to hear was God's voice. On the other 3,439,923,653,459 times it was through other means like something I read (the Bible or some other book), a song I heard, the counsel of a friend, the criticism of a detractor, or that deep down feeling in my gut.

The last few weeks the messages have come through the more ordinary means listed above. As a result of the constant bombardment of one message, we have reached a decision as a family to begin actively pursuing the fostering to adopt process. We feel like we are being led to expand our family by welcoming in a child that needs a caring home. The other message is more of a personal message for me alone. I'm still trying to process what action, if any, I'm supposed to take. I'm trying to determine if he is pointing out something that needs correcting and by what means he wants me to take that action.

Listening to God's voice through his many communication channels is one of the most exciting, confusing, and scary activities I know. I am constantly asked how one knows what God wants them to do. I usually fall into my standard spiel that begins with paragraph 1 above. My own experience and the testimonies of many other people confirm that God will actually speak to you and you will recognize his voice through these means.

Sometimes you will hear people sort of jokingly say, "I wish God would speak to me in a burning bush so I'll know for sure." I've wished the same thing. In fact, I was sharing with a friend the other night a decision I've made and I'm 99% sure it's one I should make. Before I sign off on it as 100% sure, I'm waiting for God to tell me it's not. And my words were, "Unless God speaks to me in a burning bush and tells me otherwise, here's what I'm going to do . . ." I feel certain in a few weeks I'll know whether he has been silent or not on the matter.

Along our faith journeys, God guides us and leads us. He talks to us through all the ways listed above and more. There are times when he is speaking and we don't recognize his voice. There are other times when we mistake the voice of ourselves as the voice of God. How have you learned to recognize his voice? How has God been speaking to you? What kinds of things has been telling you?

Tales from Venus & Mars

A series of incidents have raised the subject of gender differences on my radar screen this week. The cover story of Newsweek deals with people who are transgender and the many definitions of that word. I received a comment on my post about The Disappearing Man that at least brought up male-female power interactions. I also finished Fusion Fire, the second book in The Firebird Trilogy by sci-fi wwriter Kathy Tyers. It was the book that created the most thoughts for me.

What spurred so many thoughts is the style of Fusion Fire. I'm sure that I will come under fire for this comment, but it is obvious (at least to me!) that this book was written by a woman. I'm certain that I have read sci-fi written by women before. Yet this is the first time that it was so obvious to me. One thing that gave it away was the romance. Other books have included romance and love affairs. This one had a distinctively different flavor from those other books authored by men.

Actually, this is the second time I've noticed it. A few weeks ago I read Arena by Karen Hancock. The romance was not as strong, but the main character was a woman. The point of view of book was written from a woman character's point of view. Again, it had that "flavor". It did not feel like a man author struggling to pretend to be a woman as he crafted the character. Honestly, it was hard for me to get into Arena or Firebird initially because the point of view felt so distinctly feminine and utterly different from what I usually find in sci-fi. I think when I recognized this, the barriers were finally shattered. I really enjoyed both books.

For those of you who think I'm full of it, I know at least one other person shares my assessment that you can tell the difference between a man's and a woman's writing. Go back and read the article in Newsweek. Read the related article about journalist Christine Daniels. She used to be Mike Penner. In the story you'll read about how he had to learn to do things the way a boy/man would do them because he said it did not come natural. That included writing. He (or she?) claims that just by reading a article he/she can tell you the gender of the author because of his thorough study.

And guess what? I think that men and women do things differently on their faith journeys. In my Disappearing Man post, I hinted at the idea that modern Christianity has somehow been feminized to the point that many men don't feel comfortable in church. Some of it is because church has become touchy-feely. There has been discussion among lots of people smarter than I that even the type of songs we sing in church are a turn off to men. Some have referred to these two factors and a few more as the combined "Jesus is my boyfriend" effect. It doesn't take a rocket scientist to see how such an atmosphere would turn away many men.

I think it's great that we have been made differently. That's one of the things that makes marriage so wonderful. Hopefully the husband and wife complement each other. I noticed even tonight as we tried to get the boys to bed. The evening had ended kind of rough and the boys were obviously feeling a little hurt emotionally. I could sense that they needed to connect emotionally with us before going to bed. But part of me, either the hurt little boy of my youth still inside of me or the hard nosed man image of society inside of me, wanted to say "Suck it up and go to bed. Tomorrow's a new day and we can all start fresh. Let this memory remind you of what's expected of you." At the same time, I could see my wife, without consciously doing anything, moving more into a nurturing role. Before someone accuses me of withholding love from my children, all emotional connections were made. The point is that at first glance, my wife and I naturally gravitated towards two very different responses.

Back to our faith journeys. There are more than gender differences that play into our faith journeys. Personality differences also dictate our lives. Gender differences are easier to focus on because it lowers the number of groups to just two - male & female. Faith communities need to help BOTH genders journey in the way that is most appropriate to them. Neither set of preferences should be lifted as the ideal or best.

I've got some specific thoughts that deal primarily with men. Since I'm not a woman, I can only speculate on how woman have felt. I'd like to hear from you. What gender differences have you experienced that either helped or hindered your faith journey?

Becoming the Marlboro Man - instant version

Last week the family and I took a few days off to go camping in the mountains of NC. We camped at Grandfather Campground, located at the base of Grandfather Mountain. It was another step in becoming the Marlboro Man. I've got photos to prove I'm getting closer to my goal. The boys each caught a 3 pound trout and that night we cooked a portion of it over an open fire.

Of course, there are a few questions as to whether I am actually any closer to my goal. First, my sons are the ones who actually caught the fish. Second, they caught them at a stocked pond. I estimate the baited hooks were in the water less than 30 seconds before a fish grabbed them. In all seriousness, I don't really think I'm instantly Mr. Outdoorsman.

We live in a society where we are accustomed to things happening instantly. We want it and we want it now. We want plug and play computer and home entertainment devices. We want quick dissolve, fast acting medicines. We want to cook all our meals in a microwave and we don't even want to program them. Make sure they have popcorn, baked potato, bread & roll, and instant defrost buttons.

We even want instant progress on our faith journeys. We to avoid any struggle that might benefit us. We want to avoid any of the hard work that faith requires. We want a walk in a rose garden. Yet we grow the most when we have to struggle. It's when you wrestle with those hard questions that your faith journey benefits the most. When I look back at those times when I struggled the most, I see the times of most growth in my life.

I may not have become the Marlboro Man instantly last week, but I did learn a few things. That's important to remember too. You may not be as close to the goal as you would like, but you are probably closer than you were when you started. There are also other benefits. Fresh trout cooked over an open fire sure is good.