Random Acts of Friendship

I received a gift last night. It was a brand new, never before used, freshly shipped still in the box beverage glass with the Camel cigarette logo etched beautifully on the side. I was somewhat perplexed at the meaning, so I asked my gift-giving friend the meaning behind his generosity. He explained with a smile that it was a "man's glass". I guess he is equating Joe Camel with The Marlboro Man. My wife and I got a good laugh out of it. We were also advised to tell our children that it was the camel belonging to Moses if asked.

Last week another friend called me from Wal-Mart. He said, "Guess what I'm looking at?" Having absolutely no idea, I gave up. He then said excitedly, "I'm looking at a whole display of Peter Pan peanut butter." I thought to myself, "How cool is that? My friend knows enough about my addictions that he is looking out for me!" I still haven't bought any yet. I'm waiting for the reduced fat stuff to come out. If it doesn't come out soon though I'll buy the full fat stuff.

If there is something major going on in my life - good or bad, I have friends who will call to check up on me and see how I'm doing. Many times this summer I've commented at how good these friends are.

This would be a good time to get real cheesy and start humming "Friends" by Michael W. Smith. The refrain says "Friends are friends forever when the Lord's the Lord of them". I have found that to be true. It really is more than a cheesy song used to illicit tears on the last night of camp or other youth-related retreat thing.

And you already know that friends are important to our faith journeys. Not just for the accountability piece. It's good to just have fun and friends on your journey. I hope you have some to journey with you. Thanks guys for being part of mine.

Hell Revisited

Well, let's hope you aren't really revisiting hell, or have even visited hell the first time. One would think that after going there once you would not choose to go back. In the spirit of my previous post relating to dialog, I feel the need to clarify my thoughts about hell and its place in our journeys. I encourage you to check out the comments here and here before reading any further (or is farther? maybe someone will dialog and help me get it straight which it is).

Hell is something to be avoided, that's for sure. I do not think it is something to avoided in talking about out faith journeys. In Losing or Winning, I reference the rewards of entering into a faith journey. It must also be understood that these rewards are not options. It is not a case of "I don't really want a glorified body and all that. Is there a cheaper package I can get?" There really are only two options - ALL or NOTHING, Heaven or hell.

The second option has to come into play at some point. In What exactly is a faith journey, I reference the fact that sin has us on a path that takes us away from God. What I do not say in that post is where exactly it takes us. Some readers will immediately recognize this and be quick to point it out as a shortcoming. Maybe so. But, I think the discerning reader and the person whom the Holy Spirit may be working with will be able to fill in that blank. It's an obvious question that most will ask, whether aloud or internally.

Timing is everything. For some people, they will understand and respond to the hell option much more quickly and receptively than others. Other people will need to hear about the heaven option first before they can understand the hell option. My issue with the "avoidance of hell" methodology is that is all some ever talk about. It is many times presented as the "You can passively choose hell by not choosing God. Don't worry about the joyful things that come from choosing God. Let's just get you out of the fire."

Just a thought.

Blogging - the good, the bad, and the ugly

As I was sitting around this morning trying my best to avoid doing anything productive because that would require work, I had a few thoughts about blogging. These thoughts are generated in large part as a result of the comments (few as they are) given to some of my posts. In the spirit of a good spaghetti western, let's look at the good, the bad, and the ugly in reverse order.

First the ugly. It can get brutal out there. Some people like to blog so they can rant and rave about all that is not right in the world, rarely providing any solutions but often telling others how wrong they are. Sometimes people like to leave comments on the blogs of others, writing in a tone that is anything but civil, inviting harsh disagreement, battles, and many times taking on the form of personal attacks. I've only been blessed with such a response once or twice, but I know a few guys whose blogs get hit 1000's of times each week and the comments often fall into this category.

Blogging can be bad because unless you want to post a 200 page dissertation, it can be hard to post all your thoughts in their fully explained form. You just post and hope people figure it out. Or, those who don't know you may read your stuff and miss out on the underlying assumptions you as the writer thought were there.

Some of the stuff you find out there is just plain bad. The going joke nowadays is, "I read it on the internet. It must be true." Some people post as satire. Some post really believing what they have written is true, but may be way of base. You might think this blog falls into category, which leads me to what is good about blogging.

Blogging can lead to good dialog. I've enjoyed participating in dialog with people all around the world that was not possible before the advent of our current technical living space. Dialog is good because it provides additional perspectives and even correctives to things. Dialog allows those who miss the underlying assumptions to clarify the confusion. Dialog enables the writer to hit on those omissions from his dissertation when necessary.

Blogging at its ugliest, worst, and best illustrates our faith journeys. We've all encountered those individuals who are extremely hostile to things of faith. At times the world around us makes a faith journey difficult, whether it does so passively or actively. There is also some really bad info out there about our faith journeys. Which is why good dialog is necessary for our faith journeys. We need to see other perspectives. We need to receive and issue correctives. We need to get further clarification on what something means.

How have you experienced the good, the bad, and the ugly on your faith journey?

Losing or winning?

Merv Griffin died this weekend. The late night news began its report on Merv by saying, "Merv Griffin died this weekend, finally losing his battle against prostate cancer." I immediately thought, "Did he really lose?" In the church, we rarely say someone "lost" when they die of some disease. We usually say, "Their battle ended." Why? Despite our grief at having lost a loved one, we believe that person, if on a faith journey, actually wins the greatest prize of all.

Last week I cautioned against using "avoidance of hell" as the primary reason/method by which to encourage someone to begin their faith journey. I still stand by those thoughts. It is true that at some point you have to understand the reality of hell as part of your faith journey, but does it have to be the main thing you understand? What about the benefits of being on a faith journey? What about the fact that in heaven, you are in a place where you receive a new body, just like the one Christ received at his resurrection that will never need repair, never grow old, never suffer aches or pains? What about the reality that in heaven there is no sorrow, no grief, no emotional disorders or mental illness? What about the joy of knowing that you get to be in the actual, physical, and literal presence of the God who created the universe and you get to do so forever? That sounds a lot like winning to me, regardless of how it phrased by the people of this world.

There are lots of other ways to talk about losing and winning on our faith journeys. Maybe that's something for my next set of thoughts. For now, think about what you win on your faith journey.

Is it love?

Monday night, all our cynicism was confirmed. Those of us who are cynics will merely say that reality was confirmed. Thirty year old tennis star Mark Phillipousis chose the 25 year old Amanda over the 48 year old Jen on NBC's The Age of Love. For those of you who haven't heard about the reality show universe that dominates our television screen, this was (another!) show where a good looking, extremely eligible(rich!) bachelor agrees to pick a potential spouse from a group of women he's never met before. Every few days, he has to send one home as he gradually narrows the choices down. It takes approximately four weeks of real world time that is then cut and edited into eight to thirteen weeks of tv. In this version, a group of 40+ year olds were pitted against a group of twenty somethings. Does love really overlook age?

It seems every network has some version of this now. ABC started it all with The Bachelor. The first match up didn't work out, but when they did The Bachelorette, it turned out to be a match made in heaven. I don't remember their names, but the pretty blonde bachelorette picked her dream husband from the group and for over a year, America watched their wedding plans take shape and finally their wedding. I assume they're still together because all my entertainment mags and online subscriptions haven't told me otherwise. Which reminds me, I better renew now so I can keep up with Nicole's pregnancy and receive hourly updates on the rumored trouble in the Bradgelina home. But I digress.

Every one of these shows ends with the jilted and no longer potential paramour crying. Their final words usually go like this, "I know we only had one conversation and it was about the benefits of self-clumping kitty litter, but I KNOW he was the one. Why couldn't he see that we were made for each other? But I love him so much, I just hope he is happy." There are several things about these shows I do not understand. (You, in turn, may not understand why I watch them - I don't. I get the fifteen minute synopsis after the grand finale) First, why would you participate in a modern day harem to find the love of your life? The bachelor or bachelorette that is doing the choosing is basically making out with all the other contestants every chance possible. The second thing I cannot understand is how can you "fall in love" in such a short time and shallow circumstances?

At the end of Monday's finale, Jen, the 48 year old, was of course in tears. I'm paraphrasing here, but she essentially said, "You know, one time I was cyncial like that Matt Guthrie guy. I used to watch these shows and say, 'Give me a break. Those can't be real tears!' But now I know differently. My emotions are real. I know how strongly I feel about Mark right now."

I tried to compare Jen's experience with my own. I fell in love with my wife pretty quickly. We had only been dating about two weeks when I told her, "I think I'm falling in love." We "agreed" that we were working toward marriage in only two months and made it publicly official with a ring after four and a half months. The difference is I had known her for over two years when we started dating. I also did not have to compete with twelve other guys simultaneously, although there is that Christmas party incident before we started dating where I was ready to show some other guy I could whip his butt if necessary for the exclusive rights to her attention.

What do shows like The Age of Love and all its siblings tell us about our society and ourselves? I think it shows how desperate we are for love. I don't mean this as a characterization of the men and women on these shows. I mean it as a commentary on love's absence from our lives. We all, to quote the Foreigner hit from the '80s, "want to know what love is."

Real love is possible and it can change your life. If you're on a faith journey, you will be experience real love. It may not be the syrupy or sentimental kind, but it is a love that will never leave you. Your faith journey is only possible because love won out over our sinfulness. When we journey together properly, we don't just get it from above. We will experience that love through the people around us. You will find yourself giving it as much if not more than you are taking.

Love is a beautiful thing, and yes it is real.

New Link

I've inserted a new link over on the righthand side of the page - Asbury Bloggers Society. I hope they'll include me. Pick me! Pick me!

I think it is the equivalent to the Skull and Bones society at Yale. Except without all the cool things like secret hand shakes, extreme partying, past, present and future presidents, one-world government end time connections and conspiracy theories. There are some interesting posts to be found though.

Feeling the Heat

This week promises to be a scorcher. Temps are forecasted to break 100 in my neck of the woods. All last week they hovered around the triple digit mark. We've been carefully planning our daily activities to avoid the heat of the day whenever possible. Overall the summer hasn't been that bad. I've seen a lot worse. The humidity rose substantially a few weeks ago, but again, this has been a pretty cool summer, no pun intended.

All this heat reminded me of a saying I heard a while back. "It's hot, but Hell's hotter. Don't go there." It was said in jest and yet it was also obvious to anyone listening that the person saying this was giving a half-hearted suggestion to whomever might be listening that eternal damnation in the lake of fire was something to be avoided. I believe this person spoke with all sincerity in his concern for someone's soul. Many of us have been exposed to the sincere efforts of someone (whether a "professionsal" evangelist or just a friend) to scare us into Heaven.

I believe in a literal Hell that fits all the descriptions you would expect a preacher to believe in. However, I'm not sure how effective or even appropriate such an approach is to helping someone see the need to be on a faith journey. There is a time and place where the reality of Hell needs to be discussed. I just don't believe it's at the beginning of the journey.

Lots of people interpret such tactics as intimidation. I've heard countless stories from people very dear to me who feel bitter resentment at such an approach being used on them. They sincerely believed all that was being said to them but something in the approach and forcefulness of the speaker left a bitter taste in their mouths that caused them to turn back later. Some people have galvanized their resistance to Christianity because of it.

Some of the people reading this aren't going to like it. I'm going to be accused of watering down the Gospel. My faith is going to be questioned. That's ok. If you visit here frequently and read the comments of others, you'll know I get hit from both sides of the fence. So for those of you who disagree, be kind and comment appropriately. For all of you, I'd like to hear about your experiences with someone trying to tell you about the need for a faith journey. Was it positive or negative and why? If you said "Yes", why? If you said "No", why? I'll be here looking for a cool spot while I wait.