Yard Work revisited

This morning I mowed most of my yard. I only mowed most of it because my oldest son is at the age where he wants to start mowing the lawn. Right now it only appears to be cool. I'm sure it won't be long before the coolness wears off this chore. I saved him a small patch on the corner for him to begin practicing his skills with the push mower. Tonight, after supper, he will make his lawn mowing debut. It may even turn out to be the beginning of every boy's first paying job - mowing the neighborhood lawns.

But my son's debut is not what prompted this thought. The last time I mowed, I noticed something about how I felt. I've posted before how I felt about doing yard work - here and then again here and finally here. In that last post I really lamented the lawn mowing chore at our previous house. I don't have those feelings of dread when I mow my current lawn. And I have approximately twice as much lawn now.

The difference is in the equipment. Before, all I had a was 22 inch push mower. Now I am using a big ol' John Deere 48 inch self propelled mower. This is a real man's mower. I bet the Marlboro man uses one of these when he mows his lawn around the campsite. Someone who used to have a lawn maintenance business was kind enough to let me borrow this machine he no longer uses until I can get my own. It's amazing what having the right equipment will do to change your attitude toward a task.

Lots of us are stuck in jobs or situations we hate because we feel ill-equipped for the task at hand. Or we feel like we are expected to do something without the proper tools. Living a faith journey can sometimes be like that. We get intimidated by the perfect ideal set of expectations that seem impossible to fulfill. The good news is that God equips us for the journey. He doesn't want us to hate the yard work. He wants us to enjoy the manly pleasure of a huge piece of yard machinery. Well, maybe not that, but he does want us to enjoy and be successful along the journey. That why he gives us his Holy Spirit.

I'm glad he equips us. I've found myself in situations far bigger than me on lots of occasions. Without his equipment, I don't know what I would have done. Now, if my son can become fully equipped and capable soon . . . .

Can you hear me now?

For the past several weeks, I feel like I've been bombarded with the same message from God. Actually two different messages. I'm one of those people who actually believes I've heard the voice of God. I don't mean in the whisper of the wind or the beauty of a sunset. On a few occasions I'm 99.9999% sure that the audible voice spoken for me alone to hear was God's voice. On the other 3,439,923,653,459 times it was through other means like something I read (the Bible or some other book), a song I heard, the counsel of a friend, the criticism of a detractor, or that deep down feeling in my gut.

The last few weeks the messages have come through the more ordinary means listed above. As a result of the constant bombardment of one message, we have reached a decision as a family to begin actively pursuing the fostering to adopt process. We feel like we are being led to expand our family by welcoming in a child that needs a caring home. The other message is more of a personal message for me alone. I'm still trying to process what action, if any, I'm supposed to take. I'm trying to determine if he is pointing out something that needs correcting and by what means he wants me to take that action.

Listening to God's voice through his many communication channels is one of the most exciting, confusing, and scary activities I know. I am constantly asked how one knows what God wants them to do. I usually fall into my standard spiel that begins with paragraph 1 above. My own experience and the testimonies of many other people confirm that God will actually speak to you and you will recognize his voice through these means.

Sometimes you will hear people sort of jokingly say, "I wish God would speak to me in a burning bush so I'll know for sure." I've wished the same thing. In fact, I was sharing with a friend the other night a decision I've made and I'm 99% sure it's one I should make. Before I sign off on it as 100% sure, I'm waiting for God to tell me it's not. And my words were, "Unless God speaks to me in a burning bush and tells me otherwise, here's what I'm going to do . . ." I feel certain in a few weeks I'll know whether he has been silent or not on the matter.

Along our faith journeys, God guides us and leads us. He talks to us through all the ways listed above and more. There are times when he is speaking and we don't recognize his voice. There are other times when we mistake the voice of ourselves as the voice of God. How have you learned to recognize his voice? How has God been speaking to you? What kinds of things has been telling you?

Tales from Venus & Mars

A series of incidents have raised the subject of gender differences on my radar screen this week. The cover story of Newsweek deals with people who are transgender and the many definitions of that word. I received a comment on my post about The Disappearing Man that at least brought up male-female power interactions. I also finished Fusion Fire, the second book in The Firebird Trilogy by sci-fi wwriter Kathy Tyers. It was the book that created the most thoughts for me.

What spurred so many thoughts is the style of Fusion Fire. I'm sure that I will come under fire for this comment, but it is obvious (at least to me!) that this book was written by a woman. I'm certain that I have read sci-fi written by women before. Yet this is the first time that it was so obvious to me. One thing that gave it away was the romance. Other books have included romance and love affairs. This one had a distinctively different flavor from those other books authored by men.

Actually, this is the second time I've noticed it. A few weeks ago I read Arena by Karen Hancock. The romance was not as strong, but the main character was a woman. The point of view of book was written from a woman character's point of view. Again, it had that "flavor". It did not feel like a man author struggling to pretend to be a woman as he crafted the character. Honestly, it was hard for me to get into Arena or Firebird initially because the point of view felt so distinctly feminine and utterly different from what I usually find in sci-fi. I think when I recognized this, the barriers were finally shattered. I really enjoyed both books.

For those of you who think I'm full of it, I know at least one other person shares my assessment that you can tell the difference between a man's and a woman's writing. Go back and read the article in Newsweek. Read the related article about journalist Christine Daniels. She used to be Mike Penner. In the story you'll read about how he had to learn to do things the way a boy/man would do them because he said it did not come natural. That included writing. He (or she?) claims that just by reading a article he/she can tell you the gender of the author because of his thorough study.

And guess what? I think that men and women do things differently on their faith journeys. In my Disappearing Man post, I hinted at the idea that modern Christianity has somehow been feminized to the point that many men don't feel comfortable in church. Some of it is because church has become touchy-feely. There has been discussion among lots of people smarter than I that even the type of songs we sing in church are a turn off to men. Some have referred to these two factors and a few more as the combined "Jesus is my boyfriend" effect. It doesn't take a rocket scientist to see how such an atmosphere would turn away many men.

I think it's great that we have been made differently. That's one of the things that makes marriage so wonderful. Hopefully the husband and wife complement each other. I noticed even tonight as we tried to get the boys to bed. The evening had ended kind of rough and the boys were obviously feeling a little hurt emotionally. I could sense that they needed to connect emotionally with us before going to bed. But part of me, either the hurt little boy of my youth still inside of me or the hard nosed man image of society inside of me, wanted to say "Suck it up and go to bed. Tomorrow's a new day and we can all start fresh. Let this memory remind you of what's expected of you." At the same time, I could see my wife, without consciously doing anything, moving more into a nurturing role. Before someone accuses me of withholding love from my children, all emotional connections were made. The point is that at first glance, my wife and I naturally gravitated towards two very different responses.

Back to our faith journeys. There are more than gender differences that play into our faith journeys. Personality differences also dictate our lives. Gender differences are easier to focus on because it lowers the number of groups to just two - male & female. Faith communities need to help BOTH genders journey in the way that is most appropriate to them. Neither set of preferences should be lifted as the ideal or best.

I've got some specific thoughts that deal primarily with men. Since I'm not a woman, I can only speculate on how woman have felt. I'd like to hear from you. What gender differences have you experienced that either helped or hindered your faith journey?

Becoming the Marlboro Man - instant version

Last week the family and I took a few days off to go camping in the mountains of NC. We camped at Grandfather Campground, located at the base of Grandfather Mountain. It was another step in becoming the Marlboro Man. I've got photos to prove I'm getting closer to my goal. The boys each caught a 3 pound trout and that night we cooked a portion of it over an open fire.

Of course, there are a few questions as to whether I am actually any closer to my goal. First, my sons are the ones who actually caught the fish. Second, they caught them at a stocked pond. I estimate the baited hooks were in the water less than 30 seconds before a fish grabbed them. In all seriousness, I don't really think I'm instantly Mr. Outdoorsman.

We live in a society where we are accustomed to things happening instantly. We want it and we want it now. We want plug and play computer and home entertainment devices. We want quick dissolve, fast acting medicines. We want to cook all our meals in a microwave and we don't even want to program them. Make sure they have popcorn, baked potato, bread & roll, and instant defrost buttons.

We even want instant progress on our faith journeys. We to avoid any struggle that might benefit us. We want to avoid any of the hard work that faith requires. We want a walk in a rose garden. Yet we grow the most when we have to struggle. It's when you wrestle with those hard questions that your faith journey benefits the most. When I look back at those times when I struggled the most, I see the times of most growth in my life.

I may not have become the Marlboro Man instantly last week, but I did learn a few things. That's important to remember too. You may not be as close to the goal as you would like, but you are probably closer than you were when you started. There are also other benefits. Fresh trout cooked over an open fire sure is good.

Disappearing Peanut Butter

Remember all the recalled peanut butter due to the salmonella scare back in February? Well, I'm waiting for the peanut butter to come back! The shelves (at least here in NC) have been disappointingly and deplorably void of my favorite substance. When will it be safe to eat again? When will they return the product to the stores? It made me think about all the pet food that has recently been recalled. Will pet owners go months without food for their dogs and cats?

What is taking so long to restock the shelves? Is it the supply pipeline? Is it the cleaning process of the affected equipment? Is it the cooking process? Whatever it is, I never knew that keeping the nation supplied with peanut butter was such a huge venture.

This lack of peanut butter is becoming a real problem for me. When I want a snack, I can't just go to the pantry, grab a jar and eat a couple of tasty spoonfuls. It's forcing me to look for alternatives, not all of which (or ANY of which for that matter) are all that healthy.

In my spiritual journey, I have made similar mistakes. There have been times where I have negelected that which would be healthy for my journey. Things like Bible study, times of prayer, and time together with others on a faith journey. I substituted less healthy things like time together with people not on a faith journey or perhaps even antagonistic towards such an idea. I tried to live on my reserves of healthy eating before without replenishing. It worked for a while, but they eventually gave out.

When I realized my error, I began the turn around. I began to do those things which fostered my faith journey again. What about you? What were the symptoms or signs you needed to get back to healthier ways? How did you turn it around? Of course, it did take a while, just like the peanut butter. It would have been better if it hadn't happen at all. The good news is I returned. Now if only the peanut butter would.