Blogging - the good, the bad, and the ugly

As I was sitting around this morning trying my best to avoid doing anything productive because that would require work, I had a few thoughts about blogging. These thoughts are generated in large part as a result of the comments (few as they are) given to some of my posts. In the spirit of a good spaghetti western, let's look at the good, the bad, and the ugly in reverse order.

First the ugly. It can get brutal out there. Some people like to blog so they can rant and rave about all that is not right in the world, rarely providing any solutions but often telling others how wrong they are. Sometimes people like to leave comments on the blogs of others, writing in a tone that is anything but civil, inviting harsh disagreement, battles, and many times taking on the form of personal attacks. I've only been blessed with such a response once or twice, but I know a few guys whose blogs get hit 1000's of times each week and the comments often fall into this category.

Blogging can be bad because unless you want to post a 200 page dissertation, it can be hard to post all your thoughts in their fully explained form. You just post and hope people figure it out. Or, those who don't know you may read your stuff and miss out on the underlying assumptions you as the writer thought were there.

Some of the stuff you find out there is just plain bad. The going joke nowadays is, "I read it on the internet. It must be true." Some people post as satire. Some post really believing what they have written is true, but may be way of base. You might think this blog falls into category, which leads me to what is good about blogging.

Blogging can lead to good dialog. I've enjoyed participating in dialog with people all around the world that was not possible before the advent of our current technical living space. Dialog is good because it provides additional perspectives and even correctives to things. Dialog allows those who miss the underlying assumptions to clarify the confusion. Dialog enables the writer to hit on those omissions from his dissertation when necessary.

Blogging at its ugliest, worst, and best illustrates our faith journeys. We've all encountered those individuals who are extremely hostile to things of faith. At times the world around us makes a faith journey difficult, whether it does so passively or actively. There is also some really bad info out there about our faith journeys. Which is why good dialog is necessary for our faith journeys. We need to see other perspectives. We need to receive and issue correctives. We need to get further clarification on what something means.

How have you experienced the good, the bad, and the ugly on your faith journey?

Relationships anyone?

No, this is not an indication that I am now running an online dating service. But it will give you an idea of where this post is heading. It all started last Wednesday night (cue strumming harps and wavy pictures as we enter memory mode) . . .

The family and I went to see the Durham Bulls play Wednesday night. They're the triple-A affiliate of the major league baseball Tampa Bay Devil Rays. Minor league ball games are always great places to take the family because they really cater to families, providing lots of wholesome, family friendly entertainment. The level of play, at least in Durham, is usually pretty good and the park is just the right size so that there are no bad seats in the place. unless you're in the outfield. I don't care how small the park, if you're in the outfield, it's never a good seat. But I digress.

As the game was beginning, five women and a toddler came and sat two rows ahead of us. My wife and I waited a few minutes, looking for the men to show up. This was afterall a sporting event. Not that women can't enjoy sports, but usually when given a night out, women don't choose the ball park. No men ever showed up. It became clear it was just these ladies, enjoying a night out, even if they had one kid in tow.

At the end of the second inning, another peculiar thing happened. All five got up together and left. Lest you think I'm being chauvinistic or at least stereotypical in my judgments, my wife was the first to say, "I guess they've had enough." I joked and said maybe they had to go to the bathroom. I guess the same rule applies to the concession stand because within minutes, they returned, each with food and drink.

During the slow parts of the game, I watched the women interact. They appeared to be enjoying the game but they appeared to be enjoying one another's company more. Throughout the game, they would switch seats with one another in order to be able to converse with a different person. Guys don't do that. We stay where we are and just shout over the five people between us when we want to speak to the guy on the end. That works for us, so it's ok. Don't judge us ;-)

It's widely talked about that women are better at relationships than men. I'm not ready to agree 100% with the notion that men stink at relationships. We just do it differently. What these women did illustrate and remind me of though was the importance of healthy relationships, however you maintain them. (Healthy is the key word there) When you are on a faith journey it is important to maintain healthy relationships with other people also on a faith journey. That does not mean to restrict those relationship building times to church, Bible study, or some other "spiritual" thing. Going to a ball game, fishing, playing ball, seeing a movie, scrapbooking, sharing a meal. . . anything that gets you doing life together is important and will have immeasurable benefits.

So, anyone up for some relationships?

Not Alone part 2

A friend of mine who knows I'm preparing to run a half marathon is working hard to make sure I'm prepared. He's the only person who asks me regularly how my running is going. He keeps volunteering to run with me because he plans to run as well. Problem is this guy is like a machine. He works out all the time. He lies down on the floor while the kids from church all jump up and down on his stomach and he never flinches. He even offered to run at my pace. When he told me what his "slow days" were, I 'bout had a heart attack. If I want to survive to run in November, I need to get in better shape before running with this guy.

Running is one of those things I've always done alone, except when I coached high school cross country. Then I would run with my team. Most of them had no idea how hard I struggled to keep up with the best. Luckily I had the excuse of having to hold back to keep the rear half moving. I really do want to run with my friend because I know that I will get in shape a lot faster with him pushing me. I just worry about surviving the pushing!

My faith journey has always benefitted when I "ran" with someone who was much better than I. I could watch their lives and see how they handle things. I could learn to "do" things like them. I can look back and see how I grew.

There have been times where someone wanted to "run" with me so they could grow in their faithi journeys. It was an honor and privilege to be part of their spiritual growth. I had to be careful not to push them too hard beyond what they were capable of. That is not always easy to determine as a coach. Many times those of us with more experience forget that we had to work ourselves into spiritual shape.

How is your running going? Who do you need to begin training with, either for your benefit or theirs? Just a thought.

I Did It! (again!)

As I was running this morning, slowly and gradually getting my body ready for my half-marathon this November, several thoughts crossed my mind. "Why am I doing this? I'd really rather be in bed." "How far can I go today? How difficult will that last hill be today?" "I have to learn to relax my arms more" "Discipline is a good thing."

The thought about discipline is the important one. Discipline has been on my radar a lot lately. I have a few friends who frequently take stock trading classes. They do a lot of "practice trading" with no money to hone their skills. Their goal is to be able to retire three to five years once they start doing it with real money. One guy commented that it was important he practice because it developed discipline within him that transferred to other areas of his life - even spiritually. He reads his Bible more. He takes his faith journey more seriously.

Another friend one time spoke about the negative aspects of discipline transfer. When he was in high school, his youth pastor was really into weightlifting. The youth pastor used physical fitness as a metaphor for spiritual fitness. It was a good idea. Eventually, it became a legalistic pursuit. "If you are really following God, you will take care of your body and be in peak physical condition" became the underlying message. My friend drifted away from his faith journey for a while. You must learn to avoid those kinds of traps, not mistaking the means for the ends.

The good thing about discipline is it allows you to say "I did it!" Accountability helps with that. Accountability helps you accomplish good things, not just avoid bad things. Everyone likes a feeling of accomplishment, whether it be a clean house, losing 20 pounds, running a marathon, or even reading your Bible.

What are the things you want to accomplish on your faith journey? What type of discipline would help you? How can you implement that discipline? Do you need help in any of these areas? What traps do you need to be wary of? Do you want to be able to say, "I did it!"?

I Did It!

This morning I have a lot of thoughts. Why is it taking so long for Peter Pan peanut butter to return to the shelves? When will the warm spring weather return to stay? Has the onslaught of pollen ended for the season? On a more somber note, I wonder how the students, staff, and parents of Virginia Tech are coping this morning. Some friends and I watched the footage over a lunch meeting yesterday and it certainly changed the tone of our time together. At the risk of sounding generic, my prayers are certainly with them.

But that's not what I want to post. I am one step closer to reaching a personal goal. This morning I registered for the City of Oaks Marathon. Actually, I registered for the half marathon, but I have the option to upgrade at any point between now and Nov 3. Now my goal is to tell everyone I know, not because I want to say, "Hey, look at me - I'm going to run a half-marathon." I'm telling everyone because now if I don't do it, everyone will say, "Hey, I thought you were going to run a half-marathon!" Accountability is everything.

Some people shy away from accountability because they view it as somebody trying to catch them doing something wrong. It certainly has that feel in the public sphere of politics, corporate finances, government, etc. I prefer to see accountability as a means of helping me achieve my goals. That's one of the things that have made programs like Alcoholics Anonymous and Weight Watchers so successful - they have accountability built into their systems.

Accountability helps my faith journey. At times in my life when I have experienced particular struggles, I have benefitted from accountability relationships. I had good friends who were there to love and support me. They let me know when I messed up and did not blow it off as
"Okay". They also prayed for me, helped me come up with ways to avoid or overcome my struggle. And I did the same for them. My journey has always been the most exciting and strongest when I have been in an accountability relationship.

How do you feel about accountability? Does it scare you or do you welcome it? Do you have people you could trust to keep you accountable? How do you see it strengthening your faith?