Just like my Father

Yes, I know, tomorrow is Mother's Day. So why am I writing about my father? Because I like to be non-conformist sometimes. I'm a closet revolutionary. I don't like doing stuff just becuase everyone else does. But that's not why I'm posting.

I'm sitting here in my office burning CD's I promised some kids. As I was writing the title on each one with a Sharpie from my hidden stash, I stopped and thought to myself, "I recognize that handwriting." Before you begin wondering about my mental soundness let me get to the point. It's my dad's handwriting. Frequently when I jot something down, I realize that our handwriting samples would almost be indistinguishable. Especially when I sign my name. What I find so hilarious is that growing up he used to give me so much grief about the neatness (or lack thereof) of my penmanship. Then one day I made him compare the two. He stopped.

How did this happen? To my recollection, there was never a time in my life when my father sat down with me and said, "Here's how you should write . . ." Yet our handwriting is almost the same. It must be some weird genetic thing. I wonder if some biotech company out there could isolate which gene caused this.

There's a bunch of other things in me that I hope are like my father. And I hope I pass them to my boys. I hope that one day there are sitting somewhere and say, "OMIGOSH! I'm just like Dad" and without them realizing they are really like their Poppy. One of them already is in some ways. I'm hoping to break him of that ;-)

In my faith journey, there are people who have influenced me and I hope some of their traits show up in my life. I pray that I can in turn pass those along to others as well. That's why it is so important to never journey alone.

Sorry Mom, but these are my thoughts for tonight. I promise to give you top billing on Father's Day. Just a thought.

The Good Ol' Days

Things have been so hectic lately. I'm at one of those points again where I think the Unabomber might have been right. Forget technology. Forget the fast paced life. Remove yourself from society and live in the woods all alone. Live off the land as best you can and trade with other people only as needed. I'll even give up my iPod.

Of course that's a little extreme. But we have all had days where we wish the phone had never been invented. Nine months ago we decided to turn off our mobile phone. We really didn't need it. We've saved money each month and with the exception of those times when one of us is Wal-Mart and we can't find an item on our list or someone at home wants to add one more thing to the list, we have survived quite well without it.

If you talk to the "old timers", many of them will quickly tell you that the good ol' days weren't always so good. They like having a wash machine instead of a washboard and tub. They like indoor plumbing and electrical lighting. Almost any non-white older person will quickly tell you the good ol' days definitely were not good.

Sometimes I miss the good ol' days when my faith journey was just beginning. I remember the excitement of my new relationship with God. I remember the unexplainable hunger I suddenly developed to read the Bible. I remember the strong "feelings" orientation of my journey in its early days.

Some days I just miss being simple and green in my faith and my responsibility and accountability were relatively low. There are times when I don't want to live up to the expectations of a person in my position and at this point in the journey. Since I'm a guy, I'll use a sports analogy. Did you ever wonder if Michael Jordan ever came home wishing he could go 1 for 26 from the field without it making the headlines the next morning? Not that I consider myself the Michael Jordan of spiritual matters, but I think you get my point.

Despite wanting to go 0 for 12 from the line and not catch any flack, I don't really have a desire to go back to the good ol' days of my faith journey, just like I don't want to go back the first year of my marriage. I am very comfortable in my relationship with my wife. There is an understanding, trust level, and intimacy that only exists because we have been married twelve years. There are many experiences that I would miss on my spiritual journey if not for the intimacy, knowledge, and yes, even responsibility that I have developed over the last twenty years. I think the old timers are right. Just a thought.